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Introduction on the use, purpose, and application of ritual magic. 19 y
My becoming an Occultist (2)
Foreword and warning.
Self initiation is a crucial factor in preparing for the work. Without it, one would be playing with fire in practicing ritual. Therefore, I must stress that anyone who is interested in this art does not take the road of haste, and forego its process. Ritual magick has its risks, even with initiation, and no guarantee is ever present in protecting oneself. It is not a path for the fearful, or faint hearted, and many who have dabbled in it unprepared have paid a price.
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Work of invocation
First time, and I was ter ... read more My becoming an Occultist 19 y
Note:
If you are of a fundamentalist christian disposition, please read no further. This isnt a cautionary tale. I dont want to hear about the rigours of hell, or whats going to happen when I die. I have chosen my path. Thanks in advance.
I have always had a longstanding .....tie to the supernatural, though my actual departure into it did not begin until I was 16 or so. I started off with spells from a spellbook that I aquired from somewhere. Simple kinds of wish magic really, with a little candlework and a spot of incantation. Strangely, with no real hope for any success in these early attempts, they seemed to work, though not in any grand fashion. My curiosity was piqued.
So, I began to study it. I started with an excellent little book I obtained from a secondhand shop, which talked the reader through basic magickal ritu ... read more Blog 4: The happening that set the scene for my life. 19 y
Blunders in infancy :)
I was born in London. My parents were both Londoners. I lived there for the first 18 months of my life. Then, we moved into the rural south west of the country, and parents rented a flat. Life was probably ok for them back then. I cant recall, with me being so young.
I only learned this when I was in my early 20`s. I was the reason they broke up. This is the story.
When I was 3 years old, I toddled into the lounge. I noticed my mothers hand bag.
I stopped, fished around in it, and pulled out a piece of paper.
I wandered over to my dad. ”Daddy, can you read this to me?” I said.
He to ... read more Third blog. Continuing and concluding background info. 19 y
Moving on to the recent past now...
I waited in a daze, for October to come, and my seasonal job to come to an end. I wasnt sure what I was going to do, but I knew I was going to do something.
To be completely honest, I felt like I had lost an arm. The health and fitness regime stopped completely, replaced in full by drinking and smoking, and intermittent crying fits when in the privacy of my empty rented flat. The smoking calmed me down, and the drinking helped me sleep. The realisation that I had been living a lie washed over me too. I could have truly kicked myself for my incredible stupidity....I actually believed that ... read more Second Blog. Continuing background info. 19 y
Continuing saga of my early years
Redundancy.
I was one of the unlucky ones. Just before Christmas, I got the tap on the shoulder.
”Got to let you go, im afraid. No orders for the foreseable future”...
This was devastating news, and it hit me like a whack to the guts. I finished my shift, and went home to the girlfriend to let her in on the news...I then went straight down to the jobcentre, and started applying for anything that I could find.
I got mainly temporary work...kitchen porter and cleaner type stuff...just about managed to make the weekly rent payments to the landlord, and then I succeeded in getting a longer ... read more Some brief background info. 19 y
Summation of events
Over many times in my life, events arose to challenge me. This pattern has occurred for as long as I can remember. I had a difficult childhood....without going into too much detail at this early stage, I was unwanted, and grew up unloved in a single parent family. School was something I hated, and there was never any encouragement there, so when the happy time came that I could leave, in 1986, I did. I got a job which paid really bad money, (dont all rural entry level jobs?) so moving out at that time was not an option.
Eventually, I met a nice girl. We got close. Around that time, my mot ... read more |