"Our laboratory studies confirm the existence of Lyme spirochetes in semen/vaginal secretions. "
With any luck, you didn't pick up Lyme disease, but, it's soooo prevalent. Problem is, it takes so long for symptoms to show up. Could be a few weeks to a few years, and it hides, mimicks other things so that the MD's can't diagnose it very well. By the time they figure out what it is, it's often too late for the treatment regimen to have any effect.
"It really doesn't matter to me if you think I'm a mature, together person or not. You don't know me at all, or all I've been through in my life. Most of my friends and family would laugh at what you just said. I'm respected for my strength and maturity by most I know, and told so often. I'm thankful for the people who really know me and appreciate me."
Of course I don't know you -- that's kind of the point. All any of us can go by is what you post.
I'm trying to use as neutral language as I can to point that out, in case it might be useful data for you. Sometimes people can clue us in to things we're hiding from ourselves.
Not to get into the gory details, but I was a precociously intelligent kid with a facility for self-understanding, and I was able to use those tools to rationalize behavior that I realized many years later I'd engaged in for far different reasons than I claimed at the time -- and you're posting a lot of the same kinds of things I used to say. I sometimes wonder whether someone could have called me on my BS and saved me a great deal of heartache. Probably not ;-)
I sincerely agree. I'm on a different side of the fence on this, though. I've never been addicted to a drug, I've never become a drinker but it's because I made a strong decision when I was younger that I couldn't afford to play with those things. What I know, that some people have not experienced, is having primary family members be severe alcoholics and drug addicts. They're not with me anymore. Addiction is as simple as it is complex. I've learned to hone my tone and words to be grounding and assuring. I know criticism is a primal reaction. I also know that it drove a wedge between me and the person I needed to hear my words.
When someone is on a ledge, criticism sounds off as if through a bullhorn. I criticized the sh*t out of my mother for being drunk all the time. She was a genius and severely mentally ill. I was nineteen when she killed herself. When my father once asked her why she drank so much she replied 'because we can't afford cocaine.' My brother lived with me as an older teenager and I took care of him while he fought bipolarity and addiction issues. He one-upped my Mom and became an alcoholic and a cocaine addict. It got him, too. This Thanksgiving is the eighth anniversary of his suicide. He shot himself, on his birthday, on Thanksgiving. He was twenty-two and the most talented person I'd ever known. He was soft, gentle, giving, a wonderful singer/songwriter, carpenter and he was mentally ill. They were my best friends.
I know a lot more about addiction, depression and suicide than a lot of people. I know that when they feel no one understands the mental demon telling them to do what they do - a reiteration from a human that mocks what the demon in their head is telling them - well - it's double word score.
Some of the brightest and most talented people are mentally ill and/or addicts. I think I know why they become this way. I think a lot of them see the world more clearly than we do. Sometimes I think it's the 'dark force' seeking out the ones that would really make a difference if they were unsaddled - and eating them alive. A lot of brilliant research on these very forums proves that a lot of mental illness and addiction is caused by parasites. Parasites are more than what live in your organs. The world right now is tougher, more acidic and manipulative than ever and it seeks to divide us.
You all, for the most part, seem to have children in their teen years. I've known a lot of honor students that didn't meet their deconstruction process until they were 21 and over. My brother didn't start to drink and abuse drugs because he was without talent or potential. He did it because he didn't feel anyone cared to really listen and be consistent in their love for him. My Uncles had never taken the time to get to know him after my Mother died, although I begged them repeatedly. I knew it'd make a huge difference, if they reached out to him and he felt he had tribe. When he called the day before Thanksgiving and said he was going to shoot himself, I begged my family to not take a critical tone and call him back from the ledge. They said 'he's been saying this for a while. let him.' I was stunned. He knew what my Uncle said. And he went ahead. His last words to me were that he knew they didn't really care. That they thought the worst of him so why not fulfill their image and get himself a ticket to freedom in the process.
Some people tithe to their church. Some tithe to the VA with their time, some to soup kitchens. My tithing to my mother and brother is to be welcoming, compassionate and reassuring to everyone God has walk across my path. I always have somebody that wonders into my life with these saddling issues. As soon as they're stable and feel unconditionally loved - they get right back on their path... and here comes another one. Times are tough. I decided not to become a therapist because it's all I would have done and it might have killed me.
I don't condemn any of your views. I just have first hand knowledge of before and after, that's all. Actually - do me an honor, all of you. My family is gone and Thanksgiving is always very hard for me. Squeeze your children a lot harder than you did last year. Highs and lows on someone's vibration through life shouldn't be a marker on how much love you extend to them.
Peace, Love and Cranberry Dressing,
Miss Helfinger
EDIT: I just realized I hadn't done anything to celebrate my brother's portal day. This was perfect. May we all impart knowledge of mineral deficiencies, chemistry, parasite, metal and metabolic disorders, et al, to those who strive to find balance through addiction. May it be our responsibility to help each other up to equilibrium. And if sometimes that takes the tone of tough love, that's ok, too. Hopefully, it's served a la mode, though. :)
Hi Miss Helfinegr, This is a touching story. I too have mental illness running in my family and I too have been victim of this illness. This is why I have become a devotee in helping people overcome this illness in this world of ignorance and apathy. I believe that people, can help themselves through education and information, and this is why I admire Curezone's Motto of EDUCATING instead of MEDICATING.
I have had experiences in these areas in work I did in the criminal justice system, have seen what booze and dope do to weak-minded women, and men, and it isn't pretty. Most of them never recover and end up old, ugly, and dead before their time. If there were an easy answer, there wouldn't be a problem. I've seen coddling and nurturing but they don't seem to work well on young adults - those kids need that from their parents and when they don't get it from them, nothing can substitute for it but the cold, hard, painful truth. All bottom out, some never get back up.
this thread change that- and further more we are all going to die, you, me and even cora Its all going to take place when the time is right, are you pretending to know more than God?
I will say flat out that I thought V's responses were pretty harsh. Not what was called for when dealing with what looks like a young person (female) in the depths of drug/alcohol addiction, but I don't necessarily fault him. In this case, and in most cases, a variety of opinions are probably best. I certainly don't know all of the facts. And it is hard for most people to understand what is going on here. But I have lived with enough addicts and have seen enough die out from under me to know that most people on this thread can't completely understand what exactly is involved, although that is not to say that most don't care. They are only giving their opinion. And you certainly put up a pretty awesome post Wombat, even if Trysten didn't comprehend it. Drug addiction is a hard thing to understand unless you have experienced it first hand. And unfortunately I have had to be on the receiving end of it too many times. Almost every one of us is around drugs and alcohol - but many don't see the devestating effects it can cause. Or are blind to it. Alcohol use is probably the largest drug problem this country faces.
Trysten is lucky she recognizes the damage it is causing her. The Thailand issue is unimportant at this point. Regardless of where she choses to go, she needs to be completely healthy or even her backyard could kill her. And I think she recognizes this, but drug addiction is a slippery slope. I would love to talk to her. Both my brothers are addicts, both nearly died because of it, and I have had too many friends succumb to the disease. If she wants to contact me my email is:
People on curezone were the only people in my life who were way harsh to me over all this. My mom and dad were not at all. They have always been proud of me and never seem disappointed in me for anything, thats why I love them. I dunno though, it's way different, because people on forums only know our online personality and what we write about so I don't blame anyone here for anything, they don't know me truly. And they react in whatever way they think is going to help I guess. Everyone sees things different. I know I am a VERY liberal person, extremely in almost all ways, with sex, drugs, politics, etc. That alone would probably create a vastly different perspective over some of my choices than say, an older, more conservative person would have. I don't blame anyone for that, it's not a matter of right and wrong, just perspective. "Truth" and "right and wrong" are different for all of us.
I definitely wasn't okay with some of the things I got myself into, but I suspect it's probably for different reasons within myself than reasons someone like V would feel..thats whats cool about life though, different perspectives.
P.S. It's funny how a lot of you guys refer to me as Kid or a young girl.. lol I'm on my way to 30 people! :)
I didn't find your thread until after you edited it, but I know a lot about drugs and addiction. I used drugs recreationally when I was in my twenties, went through treatment, got hooked on the twelve steps, and became an alcohol drug abuse counselor in my thirties.
The thing that gives me peace of mind was deciding to make my relationship with the source of my being the number one priority in my life. Knowing that I didn't create myself and giving thanks for the gift of life by doing something good for others without asking for anything in return will bring you into perfect alignment and then everything will become Crystal C.. I am still moving into position. Not completely healed yet, but most definitely getting there.
Please send me a PM and let me know what's going on and maybe I can say something that will help.
somehow i know that everything is going to be ok...
i don't have a clue how i know that i know...
i only know that i know... you know...
hmmmmm...
i think the knower knows...
it certainly aint my nose that knows...
wow...!!! what prose is a rose in a nose that knows...
which translated means...
"it's a wonderful day in the neighborhood"...
lol...
;-)
Home
edited- Thanks to all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
