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Hey guys I need some help!

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  • Hey guys I need some help! by  sobeman88  23 mon  904  Relationship
    So I just broke up with my girlfriend and I am devastated. I really do love her. What is the best way of getting her back? I hear many times the best way is to ignore her and give her the needed space. I have a hard time doing this. We have only been broken up for two days and I keep calling and texting and she doesnt want anything to do with me. Why is this?!

    Why is it that girls get over relationships faster than guys? We broke up once before and she asked me back out. So this time, I miss her the most. So is it my best bet to ignore her?

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    • Re: Hey guys I need some help! by  BlueRose  23 mon  852
      Ummm...I don't think girls get over relationships faster than guys. How fast someone gets over a relationship is based on a lot of factors. If relationship was toxic, the person who initiated the breakup will no doubt heal faster. If a person thought that the relationship was going well only to find that the other one was cheating, then it will take longer to heal. I could go on and on with specific examples but I'm sure you get the point.

      How do you get her back? It's hard to say without knowing who initiated the break up or what the reasons were. You mentioned giving her needed space. Did she initiate the breakup? Did she tell you she needed space?

      When it comes to her not wanting to have anything to do with you---again, it's hard to say why that is without more info.

      As for continuing to text and call her---I would strongly suggest that you lay off. You could end up crossing that fine line between just wanting to keep in touch and outright stalking.

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      • Re: Hey guys I need some help! by  sobeman88  23 mon  880
        Thanks for your input. She initiated the break up. And I think its weird how you can be in a relationship with someone for two years and when you talk to them while being broken up for 48 hours, its considered stalking. Its a hard concept to grasp, but I guess its life.

        Again, she initiated the break up. Last night I noticed on her facebook status it said "I dont know why I am so attracted to you, I guess opposites do really attract".....this confuses me. So we have been broken up for 48 hours and she writes something like that. About me or someone else? Hard to tell. Because after that post, she texted me first but then never texted back. I am very confused.

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        • Re: Hey guys I need some help! by  BlueRose  23 mon  883
          You're welcome.

          However, first of all, I didn't say that texting someone 48 hours after breaking up is considered stalking. What I did say was that there is a fine line between trying to get in touch and stalking. You mentioned texting her frequently during this time without getting a response from her. IMO, at this point if you don't hear from her at all, it's best not to text her again.

          She's either very confused or playing head games with you. Instead of texting her, how about emailing her and getting right to the point? Ask her straight up what it is that she wants. Does she want to break off contact entirely? Does she want a break from keeping in touch? If so, how long a break? Let her know that if she wants a break from keeping in touch, that there will be no guarantee that you will be free to take up the relationship again. Let her know that you won't stay in limbo for long. You need to grieve then move on. After telling her all this, wait for her response. If she responds and says that she wants to end all contact, then respect her wishes and move on. If she wants a temporary break, write back and remind her that you may not be available when she is ready to get back together. Finally, if she doesn't answer your original email at all, take that as a sign that she considers the relationship to be over. Then leave it at that. Work on healing and getting over her.

          If she continues to play head games, then YOU tell her you've had enough.

          Best of luck with everything.

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