So i was with this girl for two years and we broke up 6 weeks ago. Now we have been talking for the past 3 weeks but still not together. Its a situation where there is no progress at all. We say we are working on things, but nothing good is come of it. We hang out and we have sex. We are happy while we are hanging out, but then when we go home, arguments over text and phone calls occur.
See heres the thing, when we were together for two years we pretty much lived together. So we are having trust issues now that we barely are around each other. She lied about having sex with this other guy while we were broken up. She repeatedly told me that she never had sex with him at all. She then admitted that she did a lot of stuff with him. This is where are fights come from. My insecurity is driving me crazy. She also isnt the most truthful person in the world. After hanging out these past two weeks, I found out she was still talking to that kid after she told me she wasnt going to. So then I get mad and confront her about it and she tells me im controlling. Whose really at fault here? I dont think she should be contacting that person when we are trying to work on things and I dont think it was right to have sex with someone two weeks out of a two year relationship.
Is this a situation to forget about her? She tells me she loves me. But I just dont know anymore if its true.
Heres a little update and some info I forgot. I am basically in a hard situation. I know shes lying to me everyday. I know this because I snoop on her phone and her facebook. I know I really shouldnt, but I am just trying to protect myself. Basically she is hanging out with me telling me she loves me, but then at night talking to other guys (and talking sexually) and also still talking to that same guy she had sex with. I dont know for a fact, but I have a feeling she is also hanging out with other guys. How should I handle this? She is definitely a pathelogical lier and I dont know what to do because I love her. And ive tried ignoring her to get over her and she just contacts me back. I know she loves me, but I feel like she is also taking me for a ride
Sigh...I went back and read your previous posts about her. Back then, it seemed clear that she didn't want you to contact her and you wanted to win her back.
Now reading your current posts, I have a question---Why oh why did you want her back?
You say that you're snooping on her phone and her FB page. I assume that she gave you her FB password or is it that she has her privacy settings on low? If it is the latter, then it is out there for everyone to see. If it is the former, then you're right---you shouldn't be snooping.
Yet...you say you're snooping to "protect" yourself. You also say that she's a pathological liar. You also say that she loves you. It sounds to me like she's incapable of loving anyone.
It's very, very clear that she enjoys playing head games with you----and it's also clear that you keep taking the bait.
Why do you even want to be with this woman? She treats you like dirt and cheats on you? Don't you think that you deserve better?
If you feel that you can't trust someone and feel that you have to snoop, then the relationship isn't worth continuing.
You wanted advice so here it is --- DUMP HER ASAP!
If you really can't stay away from her, then maybe it's time for some counseling to find out why you keep going back to her. I think you need to do this because even if you don't go back to her, you most likely will end up in a similar relationship. You will just keep going round and round doing the same old dance.
Oh---and you ask who is at fault here---Both of you are at fault. She is at fault for treating you poorly and playing head games. You are at fault for taking her back and putting up with all the BS and drama.
It sounds as if you both are pretty young - early 20's, perhaps. "First loves" are often really "First lusts." Hanging out and having sex are not the basis of a long-lasting, healthy relationship. Take what you've learned from this relationship, process it, and set forth boundaries of honesty, respect, and save the sex for when you feel that it's safe - safe, meaning that the sex won't cloud your common interests and goals.
Sorry to lay it on the line, but somebody's gotta. Never try to change the stripes on a zebra...she's a liar, you know that and I know that. So, why go anywhere else for answers other than yourself? You are the problem. You continue to beat your head on the wall over this girl when it's obvious that she is banging other guys. That would make anybody insecure, so...you're pretty normal. That's the good news. Bad news is that you need to start managing relationships like a successful man...not a high schooler. Never let a woman get over on you so that you're hanging on every situation like it's make it or break it. She has you where she wants you. You want. You probably scurry to the phone when she rings. Enough with that crap. Stand up straight and tall, acknowledge that she may be a great gal and all, but she's a liar and doing other dudes because that's who she is. If that doesn't sit well with you (and it shouldn't), start the dumping phase right now. Today. Dating for years like you've done reveals the future. And it ain't that bright with her, is it? You can do better. It takes balls. That's what we successful guys do. No shame in leaving a once-hot romance...we've all been there done that.
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Need some help! 
