I remember previous posts and I'm sorry for your personal misery. Supplements are not the solution to managing your issues - they can assist and HELP in conjunction with strong counseling, but they are useless as a "cure." My use of CAPS is not meant to infer shouting or a raised voice - caps are merely used to emphasize, only.
Talking it out and hearing the "same thing" over ands over may seem redundant, but it typically takes a victim of domestic violence and/or abuse to hear something no less than 6 times before it literally sinks in, and there are a number of reasons for this that I won't go into in this response.
Counseling takes time, period. There is NO QUICK FIX or simple answer to managing crippling depression - there just isn't. There's no medication that will erase learned and programmed behaviors that are a result of a miserable childhood - there just isn't. It takes time, courage, and patience for all combined options to produce positive results and forward momentum on your healing path. By contacting your local abuse hotline OR http://www.ndvh.org,
you may be eligible to receive counseling AT NO COST - and, just because it's free does not mean that it's inferior, by any means! You may also want to check out http://www.lovefraud.com
to learn how to cope with toxic family and friends.
You are an adult, now, and you'll have to determine your own course of actions, my dear. Although you had a terrible upbringing, that fact cannot be used as an excuse for the rest of your life. You are not alone in your experiences and you CAN take steps to end the cycle and have a fulfilling and productive life.
Whatever your choices are, I wish the very best to you and offer you brightest blessings on your healing journey.