Snobetty, maybe some of this will help.

HI Snobetty.
I hope today is a little better.
Here is a hope inspiring interview that changed my healing process.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=tjLouLHH-_I


http://anitamoorjani.com/?page_id=1054


And if that doesn't resonate for you, this woman has a some great tools for releasing negative thinking no matter what the situation is.
http://www.thework.com/index.php



It's kindof a short cut to the enlightened sense of acceptance of Buddhism.
She talks about "loving what is", if that makes any sense. Even if what is seems like a terrible situation.
It has really helped me to release a lot of fears and negative beliefs about myself pretty quickly.
There are a lot of free reading materials, tools, and videos available on her site.

Since you mentioned you were on SSRI's when all this began for you, it is important that you realize that addressing the emotional pain that preceded these health issues will be really beneficial for your complete healing, when you are ready.

Have you ever tried EFT? That is also very simple, quick, easy. It has helped a lot with my anxiety through this process.
https://www.google.com/search?q=EFT+for+anxiety&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a#q=EFT+for+anxiety&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=Xx2&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=vid&ei=2p-yT8rULYmSiQK7tPnzAw&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=4&ved=0CCAQ_AUoAw&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_qf.,cf.osb&fp=93c45eb2ae6eb8eb&biw=960&bih=450

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