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by aussiewoman
10 year
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Relationship 1 [A]

tdonald
Re: Single men
PM tdonald
Date: 6/5/2003 8:23:38 PM ( 10 year ago )
Hits: 753
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URL: http://curezone.com/forums/fm.asp?i=331243
Men are accused of not understanding women... well, is it possible the reverse is true also? Seems so to me.
It can be very hard to get a man to talk about his feelings...absolutely right. Men are secretive and protective of their feelinss. Can I tell you why? Conditioning while growing up, expectations, violation of trust... all these and probably more. Every man has his reasons... take the time, make the effort to find out why. I guarantee, men do have feelings.
The "benefits of having a lady to sleep with"... that sounds so condecending. Where's friendship, partnership, relationship? Yeah being superficial, it's easy to say guys like a warm sleeping partner... aren't the 'benefits' mutual? If not, why are you there?
Think about this, 'turning cold' is still communication, not what you wanted or expected but still communication. Ask again... in another way, at another time. Men withdraw to process their feelings. Quit believing you know what's happening inside the man.
It might not be about you at all.
You say, "Ask for what you want and if he cant give it, try to move on." For me, that sums up the problem quite well. Has that advice worked in the past? What makes you believe it will work in the future?
You want commitment... then you be committed, convey that with your words and actions. Quit looking for the ideal man to solve all your problems, he doesn't exist (but don't tell him that).
How can I become a better partner? What do I do that creates this situation? Ask yourself that instead. Next time you catch yourself pointing a finger, look at your hand, there are three fingers pointing back at you.
And guys that applies to you too.
Best wishes,
Tom
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