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Consciousness and Awareness #2
Room for the Life
Date: 3/7/2006 10:19:08 AM ( 7 year ago )
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I would like to set out my intentions to the Universe, and I've found it helpful to do so on Curezone before. As many people as can align themselves with my intentions, the stronger they will serve to be.
I have very recently been diagnosed with a huge ovarian cyst (19cm). The cyst has seemingly ballooned in about 4 weeks time. I did not detect it prior to that despite lots of massage, cleansing and contortion-type activity. I have been utilizing everything that I know to shrink it myself, but have not been able to influence it and there is a real danger of it rupturing inside me. I consented to an exploratory surgery and removal of the cyst. In preparing for the surgery they found a 4cm cyst on my other ovary and now suspect that my appendix has "sister" tumours. They suspect that I have a rare condition, and only recently documented, where the appendix is the cause and the ovarian cysts are just the by-product, which would explain why all my liver cleansing and hormone regulation work has not had much of an effect. It looks now like I will lose one ovary completely, the other should be okay, but they may remove the appendix as well.
Needless to say, it has been difficult for me to accept having a surgery, let alone losing organs that I know perform valuable functions for me. I have, in the past week, been faced with some of the biggest decisions of my life, and some of the toughest choices as well. I've had to face my own mortality in a sense since I've been asked what my wishes would be if they were to discover invasive cancer in the surgery. My gut response to that elicited a reaction of, "that is like not choosing life".
I think I have chosen life. I feel that everything is really really fine, in a deep way. I feel the Universe is giving my many signs that I am on the right path. I feel, perhaps for the first time, like I am respecting my body. I feel I am honouring my truths, and honouring myself. I am taking a great deal of strength from this situation. My meditation is deep and I feel very tuned-in. I look, and feel, a bit like I'm pregnant. I feel a new life will begin for me after this surgery. I feel I will come home with something new for myself.
I see the surgery going very smoothly. I see the surgeon removing the cyst easily, and whole, without spilling. I see the situation isolated to my left ovary and perhaps my appendix. I see my right ovary retained intact. I see the surgeon cleaning the abdominal cavity and removing all material associated with the appendix condition. I see my recovery as smooth. Most importantly, I see that this situation is providing an opportunity for me to drop the fear that I have been holding my whole life. I look forward to a new life without these limiting fears. I see this situation as an opportunity for me to become much stronger and much better able to help those around me.
My surgery is Thursday, March 9 at about noon-time, here in Toronto. Please send me good thoughts and vibrations if you are able, reiki, if you are able or take a moment to align with my intentions in order to strengthen them.
I am deeply appreciative. Thank you for listening.
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