Re: problem with my sister EDITED by been there done that ..... Relationship Support Forum
Date: 7/20/2007 11:36:11 PM ( 6 year ago)
Narcissists have a self-made empire to maintain (right now your sister is CREATING it, she has already succeeded with your parents) and cannot allow happiness to exist within that empire if they did not cause that happiness (they're losing control).
(it can also be thought of as a primal jealousy)
"the family was laughing and having a good time, she found a way to put an end to that"
Narcissists are people that like to cause evil, they are DIFFERENT people. It seems completely unthinkable, unfathomable and illogical to us that there are people that do this, but they don't think what they do is unjust. They think the world should be the way they want it to be and can't see outside themselves. They have ALOT of smiles and jokes meant to cover up their schemes, mock absolutes, avoid rationality (lest you notice what is unjust), create uncertainty in communication and cause emotional chaos. They know exactly how to behave "nice" when friends come over. It is extremely rare, if ever, that they ask an innocent and academic question. All of the questions they ask are "pointed" (very often IRRELEVANT just for that reason) because they intend to discover new schemes that they can work out ("casing the joint"). They may also try schemes on aquaintances and strangers, but never is it so easy and fulfilling as when they scheme on FAMILY,...because they know what makes you tick and can easily make you emotional (they constantly use "emotional" words and subjective phrases in order to make you emotional). TRUTH is OBJECTIVE and they want you to avoid being OBJECTIVE. Schemes require SECRECY and they will often talk (deceive) others into cooperating in SECRECY even if the other person has no sinister intention (they will "call" it "fun" or a "joke"). They cannot allow conversations to be peaceful when they work their schemes (which is constant), they need to create an atmosphere of CHAOS, doubt and uncertainty. They will choose their words carefully to cause uncertainty and bad emotions.
They are very CUNNING and will often play dumb (and innocent) in order to set the tone for conversation (the power of suggestion, thoughts must not be completed in order for evil to happen,...evil is illogical).
Think of evil as an animal, it knows what it needs to survive. The reason your parents don't stop your sister is that they simply can't believe it's really happening (and don't want to admit either). Your sister needs your parents to NOT THINK rationally so they won't notice what's happening to them, she needs them to avoid PEACE and rational thinking. If you can manage to have heart to heart talks with your parents and explain this to them, they might wake up, but it might not be wise to try that until your husband is home (I think you mentioned your husband is away). Right now, you and your daughter are vulnerable to your sister and your parents are brainwashed into being obedient to your sister.
NEVER expect a "GOOD" thought to come from them (it is possible, but don't get your hopes up).
I wish I was wrong.
I know it breaks your heart to have to deal with a situation like this. I suffered 51 years of suicidal depression and had my heart broken continuously all my life. I was not surprised anymore that they insisted on schemes, I was amazed at how indifferent to me they always were.
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