Blog: Finding my way to myself...
by b2reflect

Have finished a day...

new beginnings

Date:   1/2/2008 12:48:30 PM   ( 12 y ) ... viewed 1769 times

On January 1st, I began my new beginning! I started a fast. For as long as I have oranges, it will be an orange juice fast. After that I will contemplate on either doing the Master Cleanse or continuing the orange juice or what. I will be fasting for 40 days.

I am in the process of cleaning my body, clearing my mind and opening my Spirit to new levels. I am also open to the fact that in fasting, my body will release extra weight that no longer is needed .

In 2005, I began on a journey to become who I AM. I released alcohol from my life, yet took on more sugar consumption than when I was drinking. I realized that the sugar was 'my protection' as well as the weight gain. I looked back at a notebook that I have to show my weight and measurements over the past few years. Since I stopped drinking I have gained 20 pounds. It is time to release that. It is time to release the 'fear' that kept me 'protected'.

In doing this fast, I AM going to look at and then release with Love, the things that have been holding me 'still'.

In 2005, I also began a conscious withdrawal of dating. I knew I needed to 'stop the insanity' that had kept occurring in my relationships. I finally realized I was the 'common denominatior' to all these different faces, names, shapes and YET SAME (essentially) type of relationships.

In doing this fast, I AM going to move past my 'fear' and now that I have learned what I have learned, am going to ALLOW myself to enter into a healthy, loving relationship with a man who is also in awareness of what he desires. We will be on the same path following a similar journey. I AM not accepting just anyone.

I have learned much over the past 2+ years. I AM now going to utilize that information to MY BEST good. I have been utilizing SOME of it. I know I AM a better Me than I was back then. I AM continuing on becoming the BEST ME, I can be.

I AM a healer. I AM open and ready to learn the extent of what that means. I AM ready to HEAL MYSELF and others.

Yesterday began my fast. It was a good day, mostly. I went for a massage. I kept bringing myself back to NOW, while I was laying on the table, I was thinking of what had to be done, what was going to be, and so on. I made myself come back and feel the experience. LOL Although, there were a few times that maybe I should have gone back to the past or into the future! There were some very tight spots....owwww!

After that, I came home and played on computer for about a half hour then went to nap. I still hadn't had anything to consume. At 6 pm, I got up from nap and made an orange juice, I had 2 of them. I then watched "Stardust". It was a delightful (at least, for me) movie. I returned it, then called a couple friends out of state, to wish Happy New Year, then puttered on computer. Went to bed about midnight, with a small headache. Otherwise, it went well.

This is MY year of NEW BEGINNINGS. This is MY year of finding ME, the REAL ME and becoming the REAL and BEST ME.


Love, Light and Peace,

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