Blog: Finding my way to myself...
by b2reflect

Day 6 and the majority of afternoon shift

6 down and 3 meals to sit through to go...at least :D

Date:   2/7/2008 1:49:53 AM   ( 12 y ) ... viewed 1333 times

know that I am on a fast.... Today we had a 'plan 5' which is a 5 minute briefing meeting, essentially. At the end they were talking about a pot luck being held on the last Friday of the month. They went through the list of what everyone was bringing and someone mentioned my name was not on the list. I said I am and would be on a fast then.

So, they were talking about the food and that did not bother me, although it did sound good! After a while, I stopped and talked to a friend for a few minutes before I had to go close a van. She asked if I could bring water (she had no intention of participating herself) because we are attempting to be a family. I said uhhhh noooo. I said there will be ribs and fried chicken (which, btw, fried chicken is good but not my favorite, I prefer it to be grilled or broiled.) and etc., I am not subjecting myself to watching you guys eat all that, with my water or juice. So, I guess I am a party pooper .

Although, this Saturday, I will be watching friends eat due to a birthday celebration for one friend. Then, next Saturday is my nephew's birthday, so I will be again sitting through others eating. On March 1st, either my last day OR first day of MC, I will be assisting with hosting Sis-in-law's baby shower...more food! It is amazing how many things are centered around food!

I will be strong and make it through each of these occasions enjoying everyone's company. I am seeing myself as a healthier, slimmer, Me and thus, will succeed at these occasions. Although, I guarantee you, I will be on the scale Friday evening before I leave work...just to solidify my resolution...LOL!!!

I had a finger of peanut butter, again and 1 T. of frosting. I realized something as I was chewing the frosting, which I typically do not do. I just suck it off the spoon. Amongst my body thinking I am 'starving' it, I am 'missing' chewing. I think what will work for me, is when I drink the juice(s), I will 'chew' it and act as if it is fruit or something else. I will savor the juice and water as more than what it is. If it is much of the mind that will make or break a fast, then 'chewing' your liquid May be the sticking point!

I was feeling cold today and kind of off. I did not want to go to work but I realized I want to stay on afternoons another month (at least), so I do not want to give ammunition to stop it, due to me not coming in. So, the good news is I went to work and knew I should remain away from people for a while. I was detoxing, physically and emotionally. The bad news is, after knowing this, a co worker did not show up! LOL Thankfully, I did, huh? At any rate, I not only had to be around people, I had to actually interact with them...more than the 2 I initially planned! I kept 'feeling' resistance...with my body, my mind and work. I was closing a van and thought to myself that I needed to change my thoughts. I did not long to have that kind of day. After several minutes, I managed to relax and (mostly) release the 'blahs'. In doing so, the rest of the day got better. The detox, physically and emotionally, eased up. I was not 'drained' from not being able to eat or whatever that was. Work went by kind of quickly. My interactions with co workers were easier. LOL Thoughts will try to manipulate me, if I succumb to them!

I had 8 oz of pineapple, orange juice with a raw egg...20 oz of carrot juice with a raw egg and 2 liters of water, today...with the finger of peanut butter and T. of frosting. I also had the (maybe 1 1/2-2 oz) Acai juice with Uva Ursi.

I had a few good bms. Was going to do a salt water flush but thankfully didn't need one. Urine is variable, sometimes clear, sometimes darker.

Used detox foot pads last night and upon awakening, I took a detox bath...2/3c MSM, 4 oz of 35% peroxide, 1 cup of ACV and 1 cup of BS. Felt good at beginning of day, just as day went on, had the symptoms I mentioned above.

OH and I wanted to mention one other thing, yesterday I got 2 different compliments on how great I was looking. My skin looked clear (which, thankfully is not a problem for me) and vibrant! Also, friend at work said 'afternoons agrees with you'. LOL I do not know if she knows I am on fast. I mentioned it but never told her when precisely.

Love, Light and Peace,
Beth

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