Day 4 of Water Fast
My daily Journey to a healthier life style
Date: 4/1/2011 3:09:40 PM ( 10 y ) ... viewed 9609 times
March 31, 2011
I felt really good when I got up other then I was a little bit thirsty and my tongue looked like a furry white creature in my mouth. I got up checked my phone and ended up playing the newest game MTV star factory on my phone. It is a bit addicting, as I have to manage a band, find gigs, training, composing song, etc. I played if for a half and hour! It is really fun. I notice that I seemed a bit more happier, which I think it had to do with I had a very fulling day the day before.
I am still wearing three shirts (a thin long tank top, and two cotton shirts along with my legwarmers under my pants, as my temperature is horrible. I am always cold. I find myself sitting on my hands when I am not doing anything so my hands stay warm. I am thinking about wearing a light decorative scarf, as my neck has been getting very cold. LOL I feel a lot like a snowman, yet it is only 40 degrees out, which is a lot warmer then it has been of late. I haven't had a lot of nausea, and I haven't feel too “ill” which I have to wonder, if my body is not getting healthier with each little mini fast that I do. I have noticed that I am developing a couple small blemishes on my back. I also late yesterday noticed one on my face as well.
Work was pretty good, with minimal stress. I keep busy and the day went quickly.
I went over to Christy's house. We talked a bit, as she was resting after her lunch. She told me that she had just gorged herself. I asked her why, especially since she is not hurting for food (she got accepted for food stamps). She said that she put too much in her bowl. I told here that she could have left a bit in her bowl and ate it later. I told her that I had learned that it takes 20 minutes for your stomach to register what is in it. That is how a lot of people over eat, because they keep on eating and eating, and once the stomach registers it, they are feeling over loading and ready to burst. That is one reason, why I try to eat slowly, so that why I don't have that problem, as well as I watch my portions as well. I am sure my best friend, doesn't think I am preaching or pushing. She knows that I am full of knowledge, as I love to read and learn new things, and if I can share if others if it could help them in any way, I do so. We talked about what we were doing tomorrow, as if she was going to have her son this weekend, as I told her that the local Children Services was having a Fun Pinwheel day on Saturday, in which they had face painting, games, food and other fun, healthy things for children. I thought that we could take her son to that, so he can get some fun interaction other then just TV and video games (at his dads) since Jesse's game system at Christy finally broke (which is probably the healthiest thing that has happened at her house) I told her we could go to that, which started at 11:00 a.m., get back to get something to eat at her house (to save money) and be in time to go watch Gnomeo and Juliet at 2:00 p.m. (which I will pay for) if she wanted. Then that would leave us time, to watch a couple movies that I rented, and even play a game of Monopoly cards, which she loves to play and so don't it. I wonder if should entertain me, by allow me to cook dinner. I did last Saturday, while I was over at her house. I made them homemade broccoli and rice, corn, the left over steamed broccoli and ham steak. She had that the ham steak in there and I told her that she needed to use it up before it went bad, so I took charge and make them dinner. Of course, it was really pushing it making the broccoli and rice, since I couldn't taste it to see how well it was. Since I made it plenty of times before, I was certain it would turn out okay. Actually it was a hit, and I had made a lot of it, and there was none left over. Christy admitted that she had never had it before, but she really liked it. Rosy, her brother's girlfriend, came up later (as they live down stairs) was upset none was left for her, as she loves broccoli. Christy's boyfriend said that the broccoli and rice was the bomb, which I know was a complement. It made me feel good. Of course, Christy realized I didn't eat, and I kind of told a white lie, and told her that my stomach was upset due to stress (which was kind of the truth in a way) as as well I test tasted a lot, so I was hungry anyway. I really love cooking for people.
While she rested, we talked about various things until she was ready to go to Family video with me. It is fun, that I am doing things with her, such as renting movies that I can share her and others. It is more interaction for me, then I got when I was with the guy. I craved and hoped for a bit more interaction with him then I got. Gee Whittakers, he lived with me, and sometimes I didn't get to speak to him for 3 or 4 days at a time. It wasn't that I wasn't try, it was that he didn't have time, and didn't want to. So it left me with trying harder and harder to connect with him. I am very much a people person, and if I am isolated, I start feeling bad, and end up self analyzing myself for problems and issues. So we picked out some good movies, and one really scary one for her. I told her that I just wouldn't be present when she watched it as I am not into violent horror movies. I told her that she could pick one out, and don't if I don't like them or not.
We rented Holy Moses with Dudley Moore, as she hadn't watching it in years which we watched with we got back.. It is a excellent funny movie. I have seen it several times, as I still have it on VCR tape. LOL. It was years ago that I told my mother about it and she bought the DVD. We then watched Alice, which I am really into re-makes and movies about Alice in Wonderland. This was very cutting edge, and I had already seen it more then once, but I rented it so she could see it. When Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland with Johnny Depp came out, I watched it right away. I have three different versions of the classic. Once of my favorite is a major star rendition of it, which Whoopi Goldberg, plays the Cheshire cat. I also Louis Carrol's two classics in a book, which I haven't finished reading. I have read it in the past, but not in years. I probably will re-read it sometime this year. Maybe I will start sometime this week.
While that was playing we talked about various interests we have in movies. I realized that I love particular themes when it comes to movies. I love anything regarding Peter Pan, which I have several versions of renditions of that, as well as Robin Hood, of course Alice in Wonderland. Anything regarding history, such as movies like Augustus or Attila. I love movies about cultures, such as the newest movie I watched last week, called the Pagan Queen. I love movies about survival and animals as well. Plus I love anything animated. LOL Christy's was easy, as she loves anything really supernatural, like vampires, werewolves, etc and horror. She likes classic history movies, such as the 300 and Troy, and Alexander, as I do. Mostly she loves it because of the hot guys that are in it. LOL. Don't get me wrong, I like guy in it too, but I don't focus so much on their bodies as she does. LOL. She is always going “He is SooooOooo hot!” I just kind of roll my eyes, and answer “yeah” That is just my best friend, and I have accepted it along ago, as that is just part of her personality. It doesn't make her shallow or anything. She is just really drawn to a very toned man body, where I on the other hand, admired it silently, and focus on other attributes such as the actions and personality of the person portrayed. It was must me the inner geek in me. LOL.
As we watched Alice, we talked about various things. I got to talk about the guy and how I realized that anytime there was a bit of rocky-ness in the relationshp or when he stated that I have an attitude, I would scramble to find how I could correct it. And as I said “I believed if I changed a bit, or corrected what he pointed out” Christy finished my sentence by saying “That he would love you or hopeful love you more” I was silent for a bit, and then I said “Yes” She explained that that was the type of relationship she had with her abusive ex-husband. I told her that when the guy had an issue with me, I would do research in my Bible and try to learn how not to be so defensive and correct my “attitude” that he said that I had. I told her that I do get defensive at times, because I have always had to “defend” myself since I was little, so if I feel that if the guy was attacking my personality or how I was, I could automatically get defensive. I never meant to, it just happened at times. Christy told me not to worry, because that was my defensive mechanisms that was kicking in, and it was natural for it to happen especially regarding all the stuff I had to experience as a child. I think this is the most serious conversation I have had with my best friend in a while. We talked about various relationships and how they were healthy and unhealthy. It was very uplifting that she could see my pain that I went through with the guy, and how I really did try all I had to make it work. I really help me settle some feelings for a while that I felt that maybe I didn't try hard enough or maybe I could have done something to save the relationship some how.
I played my newest game on my phone. I told Christy about it, until my phone battery was blinking low. I told her how addicting it was. She laughed because, she plays a computer game, that I can't remember the name of it, but she said if I ever play it I would probably like that one too. I told her that I had played this game online before, but it was one of those ones that you only get to play an hour of it, and then you have to buy it. This game is very much like it if not the same. I can't remember, but all I know is that I love it! LOL
Later on as we talked, I joked to her “Why weren't you a guy instead of a girl?” Christy laughed again. We have joked about this over the 25 years we have known each other. We have been very close friends since I was 12 years old (I am slightly older then her). There was a period of time of seven years we lost touch, do to her marriage and moving a lot, but when we saw each other again, it was like we had never been apart. We both cried at the reunion. But, I digress, we have joked about it over the years, as we get along so good and compliment each other's strengths and weakness, that if she was a guy, we would have been a couple. Christy joked that she would be the guy, we probably would have been married since High School and have 4 or 5 kids. I looked at her and said “Huh?” She laughed me and said “ Hey, you would be having them not me!” I told her that she would have to be buff too, because I wanted a “hot” guy. We laughed a bit. I then told her that I really don't it would matter to me, since I accept her as she is, as I am sure if she was a guy, I would do that same. We joked about her “guy” characteristics that she probably would have, such as she would drink beer, instead of so much soda (but that might not change, since her personality is for drinking soda), hanging out with the guys, and watching sports. LOL I did find out if she would have been a guy, her name would have been Christopher Michael, (which was my brother's name for the first 3 days of his life, until my mother changed it to Christopher Ray! LOL). I told her if would have been born a boy, my name would have been Joel. Yuck, I hate that name, and I am glad I wasn't born a boy!
I heard for one of my online Christian friends, that I used to fellowship in a Christian chat room with. He always encouraged me in my times of hardship. We talked a couple times, while the guy was living with me, but since he knew that it made me feel a bit horrible talking to a guy while seeing the guy, even thought it was nothing but as fellow Christians, we stopping talking other then a text once in a while. He knew that the guy was out of my life, but he said that he had been thinking about me and wondering how I was doing. I text him back and said I was doing well, and getting my faith back on track. His response was almost funny, yet very encouraging, as he said “I have been waiting for 18 months to hear those wonderful words. I have been praying for you. Praise the Lord!” I laughed a bit over it. He then said I should call him sometime to just catch things up with him, as he has a lot to share regarding the direction is moving him into. The last time I spoke with him on the phone, which was over a year ago, God was moving him to get into a type of ministry. I told him if he was available, I probably call him over the weekend. Talking about calling people, I called my Dad but I got my step mother's voice mail (as it is her cell phone) I called back on March 22, 2011 and not no call back then either. I was hoping that he would call back, but he never did. I was a bit frustrated, because it is starting to feel like the last time I called my father and no one would call me back. The last time I got fed up trying to communicate and I finally gave up for 9 months until I broke down in January and called him again. I know I shouldn't get frustrated, but it happens because I feel bit of loss of not getting called back as well, as I start wondering if he has gotten tired of communicating with me, as he has in the past. I guess it is a bit of rejection in there that I am feeling. Plus, I wonder if my Dad is seeing that I am calling or my step mother is just sidelining them as nothing. Oh well, I will keep on trying and be very patient. I just hope that my father is okay and all is fine with him. I guess that is one reason why I am a bit edgy about not getting called back.
So the night was filled with laughter. Christy's sister, Sunny, came over and we talked about guys a bit. It was nice to feel positive and normal as a woman with another group of women. I found out that the one really nice looking single attorney, that I had met a couple times at the office, is her attorney, as we both talking about how good looking he was. LOL. Of course, I was wondering what his personality was like, while Sunny was emotionally drooling over his looks. Man, I am such geek when it comes to being more interested in a person's personality.
Christy and her boyfriend were eating gummy worms and gummy bears. Christy offered me one When I declined, she said that they have no fat in them, but I had a comeback that they were decked hard with sugar. LOL We talked about our favorite ones (which on the original German brand Haribo Gummy bears, I only like the clear ones that are pineapple flavored. I never liked the cheapy ones like that ones she had.), and how Christy has OCD when it comes to eating her gummy bears. I laughed because I arrange my M&M's by color and quantity, like she does her gummy bears by color. LOL Later on, she had a Klondike bar, and offered me one. I said now. Then even later, she went into the kitchen to eat again. I went with her and looked in the fridge. She had beans, and Beef and Mac & cheese (which was their dinner), hot dogs, some broccoli. She told me that she had plenty and if I was hungry, I could grab something. I just looked at the food and enjoyed the smell. I told there that I wasn't really hungry, but it all looked good, if she knew that I mean. She said she had had times like that. She then said that I should get something to eat. I then realized that she must have realized that I haven't been eating, since I go to her house after work, and sometimes there I am there for hours a time, without snacking on something like I have in the past, when I was doing so just a month prior. I am sure she has notice that I am not eating over at her house, and all I am doing is drinking water. I think she might be concerned, but trying to get me to eat, gently on the sly. LOL. You got to love my best friend.
After the last movie (Alice), it was really late when I got home, as we watched the first movie starting at 7:30 p.m. It was after midnight. I told her that I have to stop staying out so late, as it is not good for my routine, as well as it is a work night. I knew by the time I got home, took a shower, put a movie in and finally went to sleep, it would be after 1 a.m. if I was lucky. As I was driving home, I spoke to God about various things in my life. I thanked him for the wonderful couple days I had and that I was looking forward to getting closer to Him, with each day. I talked about how I was willing to move in the direction that He knew that the best for me, as well as patiently wait (if possible) for the possible person that He knew that was right for me. I got a little bit choked up telling him this, as it was hard to admit how much I desire to have my own family and to have a piece of life, that many of my friends and family already have. It seems that one thing I desire the most is always well beyond my reach, and it frustrates me and at times really depresses me deeply.
When when I got home and did all that, I was right. It was 1:30 when the time I really settled down in bed. My tongue was really white, so I brushed my teeth and tongue again after my shower. I was in the shower probably 20 minutes or more. I tried to do a bit of body brushing before hand, but I just wanted hot water, as I was really cold. I massaged my left knee a bit before my shower, as when I was over at Christy's it started hurting me really badly, which was really unusual, since if I have had issues with my knee it is always my left, since I got stitches in it. I was wondering why the ache was happening and what might be going on in my body. Since I am only on Day 4 of my water fast, I don't think it was doing any major healing, but then again, since I only spend one day re-feeding, I might have still triggered my body to repair, as I started my water fast again so soon. While I was in the shower, I talked to God a bit more regarding the guy, and my movement toward away from him. I talked about what type of guy that I would love to have in my life. I prayed for the guy, as well as my mother and father, and a couple other of my friends, as I soaked under the steaming hot water. It felt good. When I got out, Mekong was crying up a storm, while I was trying to get in my pajamas. I knew that she wanted. I picked her up, held her and pet her for like 5 minutes. Since I have been not coming home until later, she has been missing my presence, as she is used to me coming home and vegetating in bed, watching movies and reading books. She felt neglected affectionately. She stopped crying and keep head butting me as I pet her. I know he Oh-so-well! Then again, I know her breed.
Finally when I got into bed, Played the game on my phone again! But only for like a half an hour, as I was really getting tired. It is addicting. I already have to two successful bands and over a million dollars. LOL I wish I had the money in real life. LOL
I think it was pushing after 2:00 a.m. when I fell asleep. I didn't feel overly tired, but I did fall asleep content and happy that my day was productive and looking forward to the weekend. Which is a change for once.
EXERICISE: walked 1.29 Miles,
WATER INTAKE: 34 ounces of water
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