Day 9, Here I am
Day 9, A blog name change to fit the reality of my life. Doing what I can to change my life, improve my life for good...
Date: 11/12/2006 11:02:38 AM ( 15 y ) ... viewed 1738 times
I made a change to my Blog's name. I feel pretty disappointed in myself that I over estimated my ability to do a juice fast at this time in my life. I so wanted to do it. But realistically, I physically needed food and protien with the type of work I do.
Another fine day....yesterday I struggled, really struggled with my cravings. I ate. But didn't go wild. I refuse to yoyo. I am on a path and in my opinion a path to save my life. I truly mean that. Without my health, what do I have? I will loose my business that I just started...almost lost it due to the drugs my doc put me on and the side effects and now I am rebuilding. Without my business, I loose my home....depression, a whole vicious cycle begins. I have no one to fall back on. No spouse, no boyfriend, no friends close enough. All I have is me. That is alot of pressure.
Here we go. Another day of just taking care of myself. Juicing again and a small meal/salad for supper. Getting my home in order is so important to me. I seem to question how it can fall apart so fast. Could be that it is small and there isn't a place for everything. It ends up like being a puzzle. Does that mean I have too much? Probably.
I watched a show on "Naked Living". How I would love that. No clutter, a spot for everything, minimal living. They even lived that way with their clothes. They have less but the quality is much higher in what they wear.
I am not giving up this blog. I want to watch myself. Life, when I spiraled, would go on automatic and it would be just a blur to how I got "here". I bury it and then wake up 20-30lbs heavier and life all a mess. This time is different. I must account for it. I will learn from this and see what emotion/emotions set me off into the abyss.
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