Blog: A Christian Minister's fight with Cancer
by Strength_by_God

What it's like to face death, a Christian perspective

A Christian's experience when faced with death

Date:   7/21/2007 4:49:27 PM   ( 13 y ) ... viewed 3104 times

As a Christian I have faith in Christ's words that there is going to be a resurrection. I know the future world ruled by Christ in God's Kingdom will be a far better world than mankind was ever able to make, and that life there will be wonderful and everlasting, yet still, death is the enemy and it is frightening to face.

I remember laying in that hospital bed after being told I probably had only a couple weeks left to live and feeling a strange, almost hollow, panic, something that made it hard for me to react to. I had never felt such a thing before. I begged God in tears not to let me die but if I must then to help me find peace in that. Peace came, yet even this felt strange to me. Death is inevitable to humans in this sytem of things, yet it is not natural. The Bible says God has put eternity in our hearts, I did not want to die. My daughter gave me a postcard of a beautiful painting of Jesus laying down across the earth praying fervently. I used to lay there in the quiet hours when all the visitors were gone and the nurses were not bothering me with needles and other things, and just stare at it. It always made me cry. How painful it must be for Jehovah and Jesus to endure our suffering for so long.

I thought about what it might feel like to die. Would it be frightening or would I just slip away easily. Would my family all be there wailing or would I go when they were away? I imagined the moment of my resurrection, waking up in tall swaying grasses, looking up into a brilliant blue sky, a snow leopard sitting at my side. I reach up and scratch it's cheek. then I sit up and look about, the world is a glorious paradise, just as it was intended to be. An angel comes and tells me I have been raised to life into God's promised new world and that my family was waiting for me. When I meet my family they are all so happy! My son leads me down a path to a small wood cabin with a wide front porch that sits at the edge of a meadow with woods behind it. "This is your home mom." he says. I fall to my knees in praise to Jehovah, thanking Him for His merciful and loving gift of His Son and His Kingdom, that I may live here, free of sickness, free of poverty and hunger and free of death for 1000 years.

I lay in that hospital bad imagining and cry and cry. Tears of joy, not dread. Yet I was still living and there must be a reason for that. I was still needed here in this life, though for what I couldn't say. Even my husband, an unbeliever for so long, could not deny that my being here in the hospital was a blessing by God. Let me explain.

After I had been ill a while with my kidneys blocking, I met a woman here on curezone, who offered to pay all my expences in treating my cancer at a Gerson clinic. I didn't know her, she was a complete stranger who appeared from the clear blue after a prayer to God for help. I was excited about starting the treatment but before I could get in I had to have a blood test. The Gerson doctor then told me I had better get to a hospital right away and have my kidneys treated by a specialist for in their condition they could not accept me into the program. I was disappointed but also respected the Gerson doctor so I took his advice and went to the hospital where I was given the nephrostomy that saved my life. It was all too weird to have just happened by chance, it was God who had brought the woman into my life which led to the blood test which led to the hospital. God knew I didn't trust conventional doctors and that I wouldn't have gone to the hospital at all if left to me. I was so tired I preferred to stayy home and let go. But He got me in front of a doctor I respected and that doctor told me to go to a hospital immediatly so I did. Even though the doctors there painted a bleak picture, the african nurse who prayed for me encouraged me to go for it, so I did this also and now I am here, alive, feeling good, fighting for the precious life my merciful loving Father granted to me to keep a while longer.

What is it like to face death? As a Christian I would say it was a peaceful fear. Without God I don't know how anyone could face death with any peace at all. If you don't know God and are faced with death, call to Him, he will give you strength, endurance, peace and perhaps He will spare you as He spared me.

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