Blog: A Christian Minister's fight with Cancer
by Strength_by_God

Discouragement

If I can overcome, YOU can overcome

Date:   7/29/2007 4:18:39 PM   ( 13 y ) ... viewed 1826 times

What to do with discouragement? Fight it, reason against it, pretend it's not there? Even I, a minister, a person with great faith and great hope in the promises of God (Isa 66:17/ 2Pet 3:13/ Rev 21:1-4/ Acts 24:15) get discouraged as I fight this disease and deal with the struggles of daily life. Every new pain brings a new fear. Every seeming setback brings a new doubt.

Perservere. That would be my advice, and I take it myself, to any who sometimes succumb to discouragement as they battle their diseases and deal with the struggles of daily life. Just keep up with it, keep plugging away. Don't stop treating yourself, don't shrink from your therapies. Add more if you feel it would benefit you but DON'T give in. I get tired, so tired. Cancer does that to a body, but you gotta put into your system the energy giving things it needs to keep on fighting.

When I went into the hospital when my kidneys failed, I was so fatigued I could hardly lift my arms, I was so sick I could hardly speak without wanting to puke. It would have been so easy for me to give up and give in, just die and awaken in the promised paradise, but something in me kept saying no. I hated that something in me. It made me keep suffering the pain, fatigue and upset stomach, but it wouldn't let me die. As I looked at the worried and weeping faces of my family I realized that I didn't want to be the cause for THEIR suffering even more than I wanted to escape my own. Now, when I face discouragement I remember that. I go on.

As I've gotten better the family that rallied around me has dissipated, that was inevitable. Sometimes that hurts but I know they would rush right back if I took a turn for the worse so I push aside those temporary hurt feelings. I thank Jehovah endlessly for allowing me the emotional healing I so many times before begged for, begged on my knees in bitter tears for. I must have lacked faith somewhere among those prayers that healing would come to my beaten heart, but when I faced death it must have been renewed enough that God finally answered, even when at that time I was not praying for it. Now that my heart is healed by the love and mercy of my heavenly Father, perhaps I have a chance to wrestle this beast of cancer to the ground.

I should go eat my cottage cheese and flax seed oil now, (yucky) I have a battle ahead of me, and if you do too, be strong. You can do it.

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Comments (13 of 13):
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Flax, Memory & Writing  13 y
Update  13 y
Concert Sermons?  13 y
Sad...  13 y
shut up!!!!!!!  13 y
Discouragement  13 y
What it's like to face death…  13 y
What it's like to experience…  13 y

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