Feel free to tell me if you disagree, but this is how it went with me. It all starts with creating scenerios in your mind of being rejected, being used, looking stupid, let down and dissapointed by others. All your other negative feelings branch out from those initial thoughts.
At first you think you're sort of smart for coming up with these scenarios because if you are ever caught in a situation where someone tries to use or make fun of you, you will put those people in their place because you already expect it. It's a defense mechanism. Unfortunately, you've been eating away at your self-esteem and you really end up cowering during real(and rare)confrontations because you're actually watching your worst nightmares come true. You say to yourself, "See? People really don't respect me and think bad things about me." Imagine a positive thinker on your left shoulder and a defensive street smart guy on the right shoulder. You probably like your street smart little dude on your right shoulder better. He seems so much smarter than the positive & "nieve go-lucky" thinker on your left shoulder....and we all know that people take advantage of happy, kind people, right? Your negative thinker knows what's coming and stops you from putting yourself into dangerous situations, like opening your mouth in public and let something dumb come out.
The problem is his technique of "protecting you" from others is too extreme. He makes you feel like dirt. He tells you you're going to screw up...You're ugly and dumb and people will sooner or later wake up and realize what an idiot you really are. He tells you your parents screwed up your childhood and your friends only like you because they want to get something from you and your partner has their eye on a more appealing lover. He breaks down your self-esteem and when you finally get in front of other people, you are a shambles!
Your positive thinker keeps saying those thoughts are rediculous. You expect people to hurt your feelings and instead they come over and treat you like a close old friend. This is what makes you able to push those bad thoughts away. But now you don't tremble anymore because you're nervous of screwing up when talking to people, but because you're nervous about getting nervous. You think, "Oh no, what if I start shaking again?" Then it happens.
1. Keep pushing away those bad thoughts--even if they are entertaining.
2. Remember that you start up thinking bad thoughts usually because you are unhappy about something..even if it's something from a long time ago. Don't get upset about one thing and let your mind wander into new thoughts of rejection from everyone and and everything else that pops in your mind. Think about what is really upsetting you. Let yourself think about it...GO AHEAD...Think about it. Then ask yourself how likely it is, think about if the person ever intended to hurt you. Maybe they were just nieve, selfish or inconsiderate...That's their problem, not yours. If you've been mad at someone for years or you obsess about someone who does you wrong, don't think about them forever. Don't go home and think about them and invite them into your home life too. Then they win. They don't sit around stewing over you, do they? No, they go home to their families happy. You should do the same.
3. Keep telling yourself how rediculous bad scenerio thoughts are.
4. Do not allow your mind to go into "What if?'s" anymore. Unless it's about winning the lottery.
6. Think about being interested in what the other person has to say when talking to them instead of occupying your mind with thoughts of worrying. That will keep the "what if's" from creeping up on you. It takes practice, so don't get discouraged.
7. Liver, colon and intestinal cleansing does wonders for your mental state. After just my 3rd flush, my outlook on life improved. I simply became happier without trying to keep my negative thoughts in check. I've done 16 flushes and I have continued to improve. With every flush, the negative thoughts have diminished along with many improvements on my digestive system, alertness and sex drive. After my 3rd lier flush, I started having dreams and waking up with engergy. Remember that your brain and all your organs work together. When you clean just one organ, all the others work more efficiently. Remember that in order of importance of good health of all the organs, the liver is only second to the heart!
Also the jumping/flinching when something happens is also probably liver related. When you have liver problems, you become more foggy minded..in a daze-like dreamland and always fatigued. Your short term memory goes out the window and then you really don't want to talk to other people. When you sleep..it's like restless sleep. You wake up not refreshed and not alert. That sends you into shock when something snaps past you. It's also causing Depression
because nobody is in a happy mood when they are exhausted and feeling foggy headed. There is another forum in here called, Ask Andreas. He writes books about the health of the body and mind and how the health of one greatly affects the other. Go in there and tell him a little about your situation. He is brilliant.
Feel free to e-mail me any time and I'll try to help if I can. Good luck! :)