You people are pretty cool. Thank you much for all your posts.
Here's what I think happened. When I returned from the war I realized love was the answer. So if anything happened I put too much of my heart into things. Heart is what built my business, all my relationships and the success I've had in life.
But its a two edged sword. Sure I made a lot of money but I didn't really care about that, it was the love that was important. The heart stuff.
Well, what I learned is: if you don't care about it, for sure there are plenty of other folks around that care very much about it. So, in a back door kinda way it is my fault. I just never cared that much about money and the material things in life. To this day love is still the answer in my heart and mind. That people are so preocupied with money and the "things" in life is confonding to me. But they are. And I wasn't. Soooooo. I deserve my fate.
And I was sick for quite a long time which is a huge preoccupation on my part. I literally didn't have the ability to make those judgement calls back then. They said they loved me and I believed it. I was too busy just trying to stay alive to look real close at it.
But now that my health has returned all these things are smacking me right in the face. I blew it big time. But my heart was always in the right place. And that's probably what saved me.
The girls were in it for the money because I simply didn't care about it. Of course they really didn't love me and consequently took themselves out of my life. They couldn't lie to themselves for that long. So it all worked out.
But to this day I have trouble being concerned about the material side of life. Money and "things". They are so transiant - love is forever.
So, I've taken my lumps, not on a matyrdom level but just because love is the answer and all else just can't measure up.
I vented my frustrations at the beginning of this forum. And again I appologize for that. It was my fault, I didn't have the ability to protect myself from those type of people.
Perhaps now that my health is back I can put all that behind me and go back to the love I knew in my youth before the war and being sick. This time I'll be able to see whether they're in it for love or the material things.
And that's another thing. Since being healthy I find myself thinking about the love of my youth more and more. Perhaps that's a good sign. We never really officially broke up. I went away, we were both young, it just kinda fell apart. There was no knock down, drag out fight to announce the end of the relationship.
By the time I got back it was too late, even though we both knew the sparks were still there. Everyone else in the room could sense it and knew it too. But I went away again to finish college and that was that. To this day the sparks are still there with both of us. But.............
So anyway, Thank you all very much for your kind and generous remarks, ideas, and thoughts. And references. I do appreciate it.
I guess I'm going to have to care about all those material things now. Put some love into that side of it also.