Bless your heart.... You have touched my heart. I can't find your initial post, so I will respond here. Yes, go back to your first love. Maybe that's what you were supposed to do in the first place.
Reading this post, I thought I was reading about myself, but I get the impression you are younger than I am?
First of all, love IS the most important thing in the world, in everything you do. The problem with those of us that live with our hearts on our sleeve is that we don't pay too much attention to material things, like money.
Don't be too hard on yourself. You are healthy. This is the most important factor. You can regain your wealth.
" I guess I'm going to have to care about all those material things now. Put some love into that side of it also "