"I am surprised to find you so judgmental." Perhaps this partial article will shed some light about not judging anyone.
This question, Is it right to judge? is one that puzzles many sincere Christians. A careful and open-minded study of the Bible makes it clear that concerning certain vital matters, it is not only right but a positive duty to judge. Many do not know that--
THE SCRIPTURE COMMANDS TO JUDGE
The Lord Jesus Christ commanded, "Judge righteous judgment" (John 7:24). He told a man, "Thou hast rightly judged" (Luke 7:43). To others, our Lord asked, "Why even of yourselves judge ye not what is right?" (Luke 12:57).
The Apostle Paul wrote, "I speak as to wise men; judge ye what I say" (1 Corinthians 10:15). Again, Paul declared, "He that is spiritual judgeth all things" (1 Corinthians 2:15). It is our positive duty to judge.
FALSE TEACHERS AND FALSE TEACHING
"Beware of false prophets!" (Matthew 7:15) is the warning and command of our Lord. But how could we "beware" and how could we know they are "false prophets" if we did not judge? And what is the God-given standard by which we are to judge? "To the Law and to the Testimony: if they speak not according to THIS WORD, it is because there is NO LIGHT in them" (Isaiah 8:20). "Ye shall know them by their fruits," Christ said (Matthew 7:16). And in judging the "fruits," we must judge by God's Word, not by what appeals to human reasoning. Many things seem good to human judgment which are false to the Word of God.
The Apostle Paul admonished believers, "Now I beseech you, brethren, MARK THEM which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and AVOID THEM. For they that are such serve not our Lord Jesus Christ, but their own belly; and by good words and fair speeches deceive the hearts of the simple." (Romans 16:17-18). This apostolic command could not be obeyed were it not right to judge. God wants us to know His Word and then test all teachers and teaching by it. Notice also that it is the false teachers who make the "divisions," and not those who protest against their false teaching. And these deceivers are not serving Christ, as they profess, "but their own belly," or their own "bread and butter as we would put it. We are to "MARK THEM" and "AVOID THEM."
"Come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord." (2 Corinthians 6:17; read also verses 14-18)
"And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them." (Ephesians 5:11)
"ABHOR THAT WHICH IS EVIL; CLEAVE TO THAT WHICH IS GOOD." (Romans 12:9)
"Prove all things; hold fast that which is good." (1 Thessalonians 5:21)
It would be impossible to obey these injunctions of God's Word unless it were right to judge. And remember, nothing is "good" in God's sight that is not true to His Word.
The Apostle John wrote, "Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try (test, judge) the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world" (1 John 4:1). Again he wrote, "For many deceivers are entered into the world, who confess not that Jesus Christ is come in the flesh... If there come any unto you, and bring not this doctrine, RECEIVE HIM NOT into your house, neither bid him God speed: For he that biddeth him God speed is partaker of his evil deeds" (2 John 7, 10-11). This Scripture commands us to judge between those who do and those who do not bring the true doctrine of Christ.
Whenever a child of God contributes to a denominational budget that supports Modernist missionaries or teachers, he is guilty before God, according to this Scripture, of bidding them "God speed" in the most effective way possible. And he thereby becomes a "partaker" with them of their "evil deeds" of spreading soul-damning poison. How terrible, but how true! Arouse yourself, child of God. If you are guilty, ask God to forgive you and help you never again to be guilty of the blood of souls for whom Christ died. When we are willing to suffer for Christ, we can readily see the truth of God's Word on this tremendously important matter. "If we suffer, we shall also reign with Him" (2 Timothy 2:12)."
Not judging anything or anybody is one of the most misunderstood scripture in the bible. I hope you read that carefully and are teachable because we are to be as children who can be taught.
As far as going to church, there is strength in numbers and we should stand up and be counted as we are told to love the brethen to show that we have the love of Christ in us. How can you love the brethen if you are isolated and do not want to fellowship with them? When you go to heaven, don't you want to know the people there besides your family if they are saved?
Just thought I would ask as I used to think like you as I used to watch TV preachers instead of going to church after I left home. While I was in the VA hospital in 1992 for two months with a broken neck, I watched several including Charles Stanley who was an excellent preacher at that time. At the end of his sermon he would ask the viewer to say a sinners prayer and then tell them to find a Christ centered church. (This was before his divorce and his promise to step down and I no longer watch him if he still does that becasue he lost his credibility by going against the scriptures.) However, I did start looking for and found a church at that time as he suggested and for that I am grateful because he was right about that. What is wrong with the most of the TV preachers is that they speak the truth mixed with error plus they have their hand out taking money to support their lavish lifestyles. That is deception and it is poor stewardship to support them. That is why we have to judge who and what we are watching and supporting. Of course this applies to going to the local church also, but it is much more prevalent on TV. If you pray for wisdom and discernment on this matter, you will find that you have been told the truth according to God's Word.