As I said my intuition told me that someone had discordance so I came to annihilate it
I understand you are going through some suffering
You know very well that I am here because I sense discordance and trauma in souls which is perhaps the real reason you unconsciously summon me.
just know that I also see what is rising to the surface
and if you take your awareness to healing of your own self inflicted wounds and away from external you will be fine..
maybe you feel to just have some more jabbing fun online because you feel that to puncture the wounds with so many jabs and the ensuing eruption will cause them to heal faster? well I cannot any longer hang out here as you do
of all the things that should be evaded, suppressing trauma is a big thing
well you know what..."Silly Goose" I am not much into that anyway. Sensory or carnal pleasures these days are not satisfying.
although it was interesting Knowing you.
You spent some time with me did you not last year when I was in Chicago?
I’ve noticed formerly in myself and in others that some people have a contrived image that they see in place of the truth,
But not you…no numerous fragmented personalities and wounded children, no identifcation with the "rebel" or "revolutionary" or "paranoid' or "little miss sunshine" complete with red boots not even the “woman scorned” image. You know as a doctoral degreed personality that if you did carry all these personalities you could drop them as these are illusory right? It seems quite obvious by your pain and suffering however that through your Knowledge of me you saw yourself, and this also is something that cannot be evaded. The truth is sometimes the only deficit we truly have.. Sometimes it may be an asset also
Which segues me into the next subject and continuing with the same terminology, To portray that I am spiritually deficient or morally bankrupt it is quite telling of the bankrupt state you are in.
I do not pretend to be anybody
But the soul that I am. I do not have an advanced degree, I did not even graduate from college. I generally only give advice when asked
And I do not pretend to speak on that which I do not know experientially
Because I do not depend on externals to the same extent as others I see more of myself in you...
For such a friend as you, someone who holds a doctoral degree in psychology right?
and spends so much time online, And who at one time was in standing to hold state licenses,
And claims to have traveled in spiritual circles, you must really be suffering to try and defame a name that is not even mine and which I have so little identification with that I play and pastiche with so much.
I have no attachment to much of anything, certainly not the name Aye. If you have any further queries of me you cannot find info on me by googling me.
I maintain I have no attachment even to my true name which by the way is of Sufi Origin
I have no reputation, no good or bad name as I have repeatedly stated, I am not this body, mind or intellect. By knowing what I am not I eventually realized what I am.
To try to portray that I owe you a sum of money is also telling of your own bankrupt state of affairs (metaphorical only right?)
So you knew I was close to renouncing when you chose to Know me, knew I was phasing out material and sensory desires and getting rid of possessions and you desired to give me a gift of a small sum of money. I see that once you decided to quit your own job and when I stated that I did not desire to pursue the relationship with you that you desired, the gift turned into revocable 'loan”. That was actually ok because before I left to study and perform service last summer, I attempted to contact you to pay back your “gift”. You however decided you needed to put on the costume of Mystery “O” and disappear and did not return my messages. Now the “woman scorned” costume? Know that I certainly tried for 3 weeks last summer to return your “gift” before I committed myself to selfless service
Which is what I do
I do not own a business
I do not have any assets
And even less money (I only used to be rich now I am richer)
I am Always provided For
I parked the inner chi as I cannot maintain it or deal with the requests from where I am
I perform sometimes on barter or for free as a hypnotherapist, sometimes as a yoga/reiki practicioner and at various and sundry times as an author. In fact I have never asked for nor accepted money from any of the many wonderful souls from CZ that visited my website or emailed me privately and I can say I gave of my self freely.
I am sorry if by knowing you in the manner I did that suffering was incurred. It was certainly incurred by me which is why i do not want what you want. I can’t imagine that all this discordance you have is over 175 dollars or so ..or certainly less than 250 (I have to refresh) I am just wrapping up a visit today and heading out.. As I said I have a comittment to service and study for quite a while, When I am available I will stop by your mother’s condo perhaps and restore you to your former riches or perhaps in your travels you can come visit here. If not I will soon make arrangements to forward you your gracious gift..When I next have time I'll go through your 392 emails to find your address.