also I'd like to add that with every time I have became upset and angry
at her,once the smoke clears and I am thinking right-
I realize the more and more the infatuation wanes down and the more
genuine feelings arise afterwards.
I felt bad of course,I felt guilty for becoming so upset and I realize
that it's not right to become so angry over something so trivial nor
taking it out on her.
It actually made me question alot of my thoughts and actions and
see them how they really are,what's really going on and not just
what I 'think' is going on.It also made me treat her alot better,
how she deserves to be treated and what's ultimately ...
The cycle of becoming angry,realization and being humbled by it-
that part of it I feel has binded me in a way tighter to her,
instead of if everything was just smooth sailing and calm waters all the time...