Bluerose, I did investigate with my daughter to the point that I feel I am about to cross the line and start to plant ideas in her head.
There is no Anna in her preschool, and she told me more than once that Anna is a mere imagination. However, it is quite possible that some form of sexual play with other kids occurred at preschool. If this happened, I did not get any hint of it from her.
It is true that we have a deep bond and a telepathic
connection. At a gut level, I feel that her symptoms do not have anything to do with molestation. Nonetheless, I also feel that something is wrong with her and I suspect that she feels neglected from me when I'm busy. Further, she probably does not have enough encounters with peers.
I have just asked my daughter the questions you suggest and here are the results:
"What do you like about preschool?"
" oh,I like my friends"
"what you don't like?"
" I don't like Jenny, she's bossy"
" If you had a magic wand, what'd you change?"
"I'd change Jenny into a hairy and fuzzy monster".
I am firmly convinced that her problems are boredom, a somewhat excessive permissiveness stemming out of my personal issues, and lack of peer-to-peer encounters. In fact she often complains not to get enough playtime. Whenever I am able to give her lots of focused attention, or enthusiastic play, or to plan a special day or a fun outing, the problem disappears.
As a matter of fact, while writing these messages, I am overlooking her and telling her I'm busy. I don't know if I'm doing this "for her own good".
About her wanting to be touched: When she was a baby she would laugh and laugh while I changed her diapers and applied nappy cream. Being barely touched there always brought up noticeable reactions. And the hip carrying played a role in this .
I would not, and I did not define her behavior as obsessive/compulsive and I will not take her to a professional.