Thankyou. I guess i just miss sitting at the dinner table with my kids (5 and 2) I sounded like a fat kid wanting to down some cake in my post lol but thats not it at all. I know when i do break, i cant overindulge, and i WONT do that, i didnt work this hard to do that. I just want to live my "normal" life again. I go to school, take care of my kids, im always so weak and tired that its all i can do to play witht hem..i feel like im taking away their time by continuing. sounds dumb..i know..
anyhow, i just wanted to vent my thoughts so i knew i wasnt alone. Someone always gives great advice or support on here. This board has been my main reason to go this far :]