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Wanting/Needing Change, but can't do it alone
 
CaliforniaBreeze Views: 1,156
Published: 12 years ago
 

Wanting/Needing Change, but can't do it alone


I'm severely depressed. Slowly over the last couple of months, I have internalized stress and sadness. I have let my sleeping pattern get ridiculous. I have stopped exercising. I have started eating a heavy meat diet. I binge on junk food at night and nap during the day. I have started wearing the same clothes for consecutive days. When I have a really bad day, I take shots of vodka. I'll occasionally make a booty call while drunk even though I'm not romantically interested in these people and not even curious about them sexually. I have started avoiding people and go straight to school and back to my apartment (single). I even having been avoiding eye contact with people. My face is breaking out and my hair gets really oily fast. I also am turning soft and can feel that my thighs are thicker and my gut has grown.

Ultimately I am unhappy and am increasingly getting unhealthy. Moderating changing is not really an option. I think I need to Water Fast for a couple days to build some confidence, clean out a bit, and possibly correct my sleeping pattern. If I am slightly trimmer and figure out a relatively simple/ healthy Diet with exercise, I think that would help all aspects of my life.

But. I. Just. Can't. Fast. Alone.

Mid-day I am overcome with intense hunger and then devour something like chicken fingers dipped in heavy ranch like I hadn't eaten in years and was about to die.

I don't want to be like this. I don't want to be eating so much junk. I don't want to be staying up late high off of Sugar and nap during the day. I don't want to feel inadequate anymore and avoid people. I want to get on the right track, but I need help.

Please help me turn my life around.
 

 
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