i am so sorry to hear of your pain. it sounds almost overwhelming. i say almost because i believe you can get yourself out of it with help. you can do this!
do not try to tackle all of these problems at once. THAT would be overwhelming. pinpoint what or where the bottom of these problems lie, and go for only that for now.
if it is the internalized sadness and stress, then you must address that first before any kind of fast will work for you. there are many professionals that accept sliding scale payments, and who are very helpful in sorting out, in an objective way, what is really bothering you.
you can do this, but it is one thing at a time, one day at a time. i will listen and help whatever way i can. changing everthing you are doing is a monumental task. if you are depressed, it is just too much to do all at once.
this may sound dumb, but i want you to try it: just take a shower today. that's it. just take a shower and put on decent clothes. if that is all you manage, fine. tomorrow you can try for more. if you can take a walk in the fresh air, too, all the better. and tomorrow you can do more.