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Sitting with what is
 
mattydean Views: 1,001
Published: 11 years ago
 

Sitting with what is


I am on day 4 of my focus is 42 days this time.

When I started this fast it felt so right , my body didnt do any craving etc and the food s not an issue, yes there are thoughts about the comfort of food and how it sedates me - which is the major thing that stands before me.

There is something in the heart of me that is resisting this change, a restlessness throughout my world that is hard to breath into. Within 4 days my sleep pattern has reversed I sleep in the day and uncomfortably awake at night.

Food has kept me silent for years and Im trying to find a way to listen to that part of me that is restless. I fear/feel great disomfort like being tickled to disraction. I have created time to fast / clear /heal and know that sitting with what is may be painful but may not be as bad as my imagination tells me. I know that it will bring me to those parts of me that are distressed and miracles always happen post fast.
It feels like week 3 so early on, It was never this hard so early before. Its emotional and feels like svere constipation in my heart. The physical factors of no food etc are no challenge as yet but this restlessness is difficult to be with.

I am going to ask for my own guidance to help me through this and open myself to the learning that is present there. And how to allow the hours to be, they feel so long.

I wanted to share to see if others have worked through similar stuff and to feel the support of the group x x x

Thank you
Matty
 

 
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