hi just about had it,
God knows that we've all had a something out of the basket that you carry.My advice to you is not give up ,the fight may be hard but the victory will be that much sweeter when you have finally raised your hand in victory( you should know for those of us that are christians we're to come from a stand-point of being healed and sickness trying to invadeor have invaded our bodies because by Jesus' stripes we were healed you can read 1st and second peters for inspiration and hope also isaiah ch53). what i'm getting from what you said you're a christian so my advice to you or any others who may want to listen is this: this came to me while i was taking my monthly shower (not the case but some may think it is lol) God said a couple things in his word put me in remembrance declare thou that you may be justfied(remind God wht He's said in his word about healing ,you also have to know what he's said to be able to remind him of it)2.the bible says that it's more blessed to give than to receive(meaning to me that God gives you more ability to be a blessing than to be blessed,which would give indication that if you desire to be a blessing then God will provide the means for you to do that also you too will be blessed (in the process of being that blessing)think about ,pray for someone else more in your prayer time than for yourself,ask God to give you (or give them)the answer to their problem ,the answer to their healing and God will do the same for you (may be through someone else)when our thoughts are on others then we'll never be selfish or self-centered(not saying trying to get well is selfish because it's not ,not in the least bit,who doesn't want to be healed and live life)3.for those that aren't christians I would ask you to also consider the probability of God and to think about the possibility of a judgment for things you've done in your lifetime ,would the things you've done be right and merit you a place in heaven if they were judged in biblical terms,if not Jesus offers to you like he's done to any person who is now a christian the opportunity of forgivness of sin and of an future in heaven . if you're healed here(which we live for a small amount of time) and die later on ending up in punishment for eternity what have you gained? felt led(in my heart) to say that, God bless us all and give us the ability to be a blessing so that we too may be blessed.
p.s I believe forgivness is key when trying to receive from God ,so forgive everyone ,no matter what they've done ,if necessary ask God to help you do so (which in many instances could be the case because of all the wrong you've suffered whether it be mentally or physically).