Due loneliness and need of friends, I befriend a married guy. As I didn´t intend another thing than a friendship, I didn´t care his marital status. He stated he was not happy in his marriage and I thought “That´s not of my business; I just want a friend” We were just friends for about 5 years, joked and laughed a lot, even though our friendship had a lot of what I consider “light flirting”.
After a break down and a moment of extreme weakness, I got closer to him and failed in having cybersex, just once, and words as love started to be mentioned. (I´m human)
I know for sure this guy is engaged in cybersex with other women, with whom he shares pictures that has given me also. But when we got closer do that only one episode, I found that he makes comments which I find kind of gross and I find very far from the education I have. He also talks much about sex, sometimes think he´s kind of obsessed with it.
He has also been a good friend and supportive with my breakdown and I have also given him my support.
Unfortunately, I have some feeling for him, because our many years as friends, and happy chats. But I know he´s also not the kind of man, with whom I´d establish a relationship farther than a friendship even if he´d get a divorced. (Thing I´m not looking for)
We have an age gap, educational gap, geographical gap and who knows what else more.
I feel totally confused. What is this? A Friendship that turned into some love? A friend who was weak once? A mess between two persons? A friendship with a sex obsessed man?
I have never had cybersex with him again, but I know he´s looking for another chance.
I would feel sad, to lose him as a friend, but guess things can´t be undone now.