I don't agree that you either believe or don't believe. I'd refer you back to the words of Jesus, "if you have faith as small as a mustard seed..." the implication being that you can have differing amounts of faith. It can vary in how quickly or slowly it fills you and your felt sense of it can be all encompassing or barely noticeable. I guess this is what your calling indecision, but I think its an important difference.
"Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ."
"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God."
I get the sense your having a bit of reaction to Bill after all, or is it to faith? I can understand that if you are.