they have modified the New Testament to put more emphasis on how Jesus
encouraged anger? I just donít remember that being one of his core
It's recorded in the New Testament twice. He used a
whip. Why do you think it is there? Twice? He taught by
example. It's pretty simple - if you don't like what he taught, don't
There are loads of things in the NT that are not taught in
"Christian" churches. That's just one example. He also
drank and partied and associated with hookers and other low life's. One of
his disciples was a tax collector, one of the most hated individuals in the
Roman Empire. These are people you'd never find in most "Christian"
This is the time of year that people DE CLARE what they want to change in
their lives. Unfortunately the real-time decisions you make will likely be based
on emotion and will supersede those you logically made on New Years. When
the time comes to make the change, your emotions will trick you into finding a
great rationalization for ignoring your stated intention.
The good news is you can counteract this process with emotional awareness.
You have to recognize what you are feeling in the moment and then make a
conscious shift to feel something else.
First you need to recognize if you are feeling discomfort, boredom,
confusion, fear or worry when you consider making the change. Then you need to
shift to a stronger emotion that will allow you to step through the pain and
take the steps toward change.
In other words, you have to want the change badly enough to
overcome the discomfort, boredom, confusion, embarrassment, and worry that pops
up to stop you along the way.
The intensity of your desire to change, whether based on a positive
or negative emotion, correlates to the likelihood you will complete the process.
You must allow yourself to feel a strong emotion, with anger being one of
your strongest motivators, before you fully commit to making a complex change in
your self-concept and behavior. An intense negative reaction to your
circumstances revs up your internal motor more powerfully than a lightly held
wish. Through extensive research, Jennifer Lerner and her team at the Harvard
Decision Science Laboratory found that anger both encourages people to believe
they can control their future and then motivates them to take risks.
This is often difficult for my female clients. They have been brought up to
believe that expressing anger is bad. They cringe and get small in the presence
of angry people. Or if they do express anger, it tends to be a knee-jerk
reaction to someone's perceived disrespect. The don't channel their anger to a
The skill is to shift the focus of your anger away from external
circumstances to instead focus on what you strongly desire to change within
yourself. It is not your flaky boss or overwhelming responsibilities that make
you scream at strangers while you drive. You should be angry that it has taken
so long for you to realize that you have the power to change your circumstances.
Many times I have asked a client, "Are you finally mad enough at
yourself for allowing this to happen again?" The question focuses the anger
on their own avoidance mechanisms, disarming the blocks they had for changing.
When you adamantly say, "Enough," you may be angry about your
circumstances but probably you are just as angry at yourself for standing in the
mud with two good feet.
Use your anger to initiate the positive shifts you need to change
You must shift internally before you can change your external reality. Anger
can be a great mobilizer of positive action.
However, sustained anger can be destructive physically in your body and
externally in the world around you. Anger, frustration, stress and the other
negative emotions that trigger the brain to release adrenaline and cortisol will
over time wear out your body by causing high blood pressure, heart disease,
ulcers, hormonal imbalances, a weakened immune system, and a host of digestive
Also, anger can eventually drive away the result you want. You can drive
people away with your anger, people who could help you achieve your goals. Brain
researchers are substantiating the effect of one person feeling irate or
vengeful on others in the vicinity, whether the angry person displays or
suppresses these emotions.≤ Even if you don't direct your emotions at others,
the measurable energy your emotions emit repels people, counteracting your
desire to connect with people in a new, more positive way.
Therefore, once you commit to your transformation journey, you should shift
your focus away from what is missing in your life (evoking anger) to what you
want to passionately and positively create (inspiring passion). Determine what
you want to end and then make the shift from a negative to a positive expression
of want you deeply desire to create.
Adamantly wanting something to end is a good way to kickstart the
transformation process. Yet once you are off and running, you need a positive
obsession to sustain your efforts.
Ask yourself how badly you want what you deserve and what you are capable of
* What do I want more of in my life?
* What have I had enough of and needs to end today?
* How can I shift my frustration to what I dearly want to create?
Put your emotions in service of what you desire. Get angry! Then employ
positive, powerful emotions to help you survive your journey.