Still not able to go on a fast more than two days; most of the time even one day is hard. I have tried everything from real-wishes.com to making bets. Guess what? I just made another bet today. If I win the 22-day water fast, then next summer my brother has to walk 15 days, every day 20 minutes with me. If he wins, he gets 50 bucks. I wanted to make this bet so he will exercise.
My plan is to think of being relaxed, tranquil, and natural and this will carry me through the fast. Now, as I am pausing over what I wrote, memories of my 10-day fast in the psych ward last March comes to me. I only ended the fast out of bitterness, because a guy didn't want me. So I started eating sherbets and ice cream, and it was unusual because I never ate processed Sugar products or milk. I lost so much hair after breaking the fast. I shedded like a tree. In my moment of peace, this event, filled with loss and turbulence, came to me. I remember all the Sugar rushing to my scalp the first sherbet I ate. Then I ate out of emotions every single time afterwards. Maybe this will help motivate me to fast, because I had so much bitterness and was also cooped up in there with no freedom. Now that I have freedom outside, I should express my gratitude by fasting.