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New Here and completely overwhelmed
jgirl Views: 13,996
Published: 16 years ago

New Here and completely overwhelmed

I was diagnosed with genital herpes about three years ago and I thought I was dealing with that as well as I possibly could. I tried to manage my outbreaks by taking lysine, multivitamins etc. However, my problem is that now I have contracted oral herpes. I am devastated and a bit suicidal. It start with a what I thought was flaking skin on my upper lip which then turned into a sort of lump with some abrasions on the upper rim of my lip. Generally my whole upper lip looks weird. They do not look like typical cold sores (not crusty, pusty, blistery) and I guess to the casual observer my lips look normal (I'm lucky that I have full lips and dark skin). I could also kind of hide the redness with concealer. Anyway I started using Abreva and used 3 tubes and saw not difference. My doctor put me on a course of Acycolvir (I'm on the 3rd refill) and they still has not gone away. In fact now I'm seeing stuff on my nose, on my nostrils, checks and now there are abrasions, tingling and itchiness on the outer corners of my eyes. I'm using Zovirax ointment as well and still no results. It's just spreading. I had these cold sores for 2 months now.

I don't what to do. I feel like I don't deserved this. I am not promiscuous. The person who i got genital herpes from I was engaged to and a virgin when I met him. This new person which I got the oral herpes (now ex-boyfriend) was not straight with me. I am attrative physically but because of this i feel completely worthless and dirty. I also work with children and now I have to standoffish towards them because I'm afraid of spreading it. This just kills me.

My doctors tell to stop stressing out but i can't. This is the biggest source of stress in my life. I really feel like swallowing a bunch of pills and be done with this. I feel like I'm trying to fight it but it is stronger than me. I just what to be normal again.

I don't know what to do. Someone please help.

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