"Unorthodox"? We already know that the orthodox approaches don't work!
First of all: Yes, I told my partners that I had been infected.
The answer to your other question is: They didn't tell me! In one case, the woman didn't know she was infected. This is very common. The second one told me she had herpes before we had intercourse but AFTER I had performed cunnilingus on her. She was under the mistaken impression that it couldn't be passed genital-->oral.
RE: condoms.... Can't stand 'em. I wore one with second woman mentioned above. But I do not make it a policy to wear one when I'm in a committed relationship with someone who does not appear/admit to be infected.
And I don't know ANYone who wraps her lover's lips in latex before kissing him.