Wow, didn't know all this could happen just because you didn't eat your carrots, but according to Kala it sounds like it may have. However, it seems to me the wife would have to eat her carrots too to get her settled down. I can't advise you on your cheating part, except that it will be just as wrong for you as it is for her and will bring further problems and will send more wrong messages to the kids, but I can tell you what to look for down the road if you stay with her. It sounds as if you are not really sure about the physical part of her cheating, but only the emotional part. The physical part would have come after the emotional with the right opportunity. The emotional will probably continue even if it is not with another man, which sounds like what is happening with the sex situation. I have stayed with my wife trying to get things in the right perspective for thirty years. It is still like I am in an emotional war almost every day, mainly over the sexual since that is the main power of the female over the male. If you are not willing to stay in an emotional battle every day it is probably time to move on. I guess you should just determine if the benefits from staying outweighs the stress you will receive. Then, think about what your future will be if you move on. Other than my own situation I have a close friend who is going through the same thing and it is a terrible emotional battle for him and his children. Bless you brother, I sympathize with you.