Re: Men seeing women as sex objects
My first question is 'Where are you meeting these men?' If you're going out to bars or something similar, most of the guys you meet are just trolling for chicks. My suggestion to meet a good person, who is not attracted to you ONLY as a sex object is to go do something you enjoy and I think you will run in to someone nice. Do you like dogs? Do you have one? Places like PetSmart have classes you can take with your dog; who knows, you could meet another single "dad!" ha ha Maybe not that, but do you get what I mean?
As for the emotional baggage I think you really need to talk to a professional. Changing the way you dress, eat, and interact with other people could be a sign of depression. A warning, though! Don't let them talk to you for five minutes and then write a prescription for drugs. See a psychologist, who can't prescribe drugs. They are more willing to listen and offer natural therapies like breathing techniques and visualization exercises.
I'm sure you've heard this a thousand times, but really when you are comfortable with yourself, the right person will come along. I'd had some really bad experiences and had resigned myself to being single for the rest of my life. And when I got to the point where I was okay with my lot in life, I met a wonderful man, and we are now married. Focus now on how you feel about yourself, not how you think others feel about you. Hang in there!