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We can only speculate, for the time being.
fledgling Views: 1,473
Published: 16 years ago
This is a reply to # 563,942

We can only speculate, for the time being.

Dear 25004,

I remember like yesterday the time I first realized I was mortal, forty-four years ago.

I was soaking in a nice bath, at sunset, and it hit me that one day the sun would come up, and I wouldn't.

Oh, that was a sad moment! I cried a bit.

But the next hours and days I returned to the questions, people, and tasks at hand, and forgot about the concern.

Here and there, over the years, I learned about near-death-experiences; and I read Elizabeth Kubler-Ross.

Then I had an enlightening moment of my own. It was a time of surgery, and I was both very sad and somewhat frightened. Under sedatives I had an odd dream that told me it was okay...I hadn't had a long life, but I'd done my best. It was okay. With that reassurance came a beautiful peace.

I will never be afraid of dying again.

Actually, I now find it hard to dwell on the subject. My questions are satisfied, I guess you could say.

And there is so much else to see, do, feel, and think.

A friend gave me a neat suggestion the other day. She said that it's a very good thing to be in a place of "unself-conscious curiosity."

"Go look at an ant, for one minute. See if you can figure out what it's doing. That's where you want to be. That's the feeling with which to approach life."

You ask, "Is it wrong to block it out of my mind for the time being?"

My answer is, "Of course not."

You've put your questions out there...the answers will come. Meanwhile, there's so much more to see and do.

As for going back to any former lifestyle, it doesn't quite work that way. Every day is slightly different than the last...sometimes radically different. It's the differences that keep us interested, curious, and growing.

My best,


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