I wish I could sit together with you for a long serious conversation, telling you about my own experience, showing you my own stones, browsing on curezone, showing you stories of those who avoided their scheduled surgery, finding all the answers to your fears and a lot more.
Unfortunately, I live in Europe and I guess you are from the USA.
I think it would be great if you could meet one of us (flushers) in person, we are many and the majority live in the US, we will not be strangers to you anymore.
Anyway, whatever you think is best for you, take your time, postpone the surgery, quit convincing your doctor, do the flush.
Your doctor will never aprove the flush anyway for many reasons.
He does not benefit from your flush, he may loose his licence because flushing can put the whole idea of official medicine under big fat question. They don't want us to be independant, they want fool control. Just watch how they behave when you want to do something yourself. Healthy patient - dead pharmaceutical industry!
Think about it.
Instead of confronting your family try to convince them that you are doing the right thing, it is hard, but they will turn into your best ecouragers. They want only best for you, they are simply afraid and don't posess enough information on alternatives.