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already is outt ahand
Wrenn Views: 1,347
Published: 19 years ago
This is a reply to # 664,284

already is outt ahand

i fyouare already acting on impulses to hit him and he is instigatign it ... aware o r not..
youare already on teh road.
allit takes is once..if you don't find a way to deal with it asap it will snow ball andyouboth will end up in a circle of patterned behavior.
i fyoufeel your self feeling liek wan tto hit.. walk away as fast as youcan and don't answer or get drawn back in to a fight in any wya no matter waht the topic the world will not end i fyou go get a breather.. then sit down and think why youw ant to act out liek tat.. and wah tis is specifiacally tha tyou want to say to address the problem
then when thing s are not as flared.. youmight gen tly say i ahve a few thign si woudl liek to discuss with youa t a a conven ien ttime.. i figur eit will take about x minutes..
when woudl be a good time fo ryou (cau sejstu becasue it might be a good tiem fo ryou .. he might b ein middle of a football game or just tired and need s to rest for 30 mintue sor was palnning on doign soem thign else tetc..) so don't feel liek he is avoidign it.. if he says he is busy ok... WHEN can you disuss this/ for 20 minutes.
when yu do be clear.. about your feeligns and wha tyouwan t to see and if youare willign to compromise? and then shtu up and let hime speak also don't interrrupt when he does or he will felel liek youare more TELLING him rather than discussign with him..
sincere ly listen to his poitn sand fidn a *rules of engagemetn* tha tyou feel youboth can liv ewith.
goo dluck
assault is assault under any circumstances unprovoked /not for defense / fir st strike youar ethe attacker in teh yee so fth elaw period.. youhave a choise to walk away an di sugges tyou do til cool down.
wha tif you hit himand he fell hit his head and diesd?
gues who is goona spin a bit in trials?
you .
do soem thign and do it now to avoid theis path remember the pe rson you married and why andquestion is your jealously soemhign he is triigerign in youor is it really form you r onw inner conflict?
if it really is him triggerign it tellhim to stop/ if he does not i woudl seeka cheap form of counselign or get sel fhelp books to healp you remove your self and your thoguts away form the moment...
if it is you .. boviously same applies ina way but younee dto resolv ewhy you act out in this way
my best to you to liv ein harmony an dpeacce
Ami B. bu t it takes two / so if he doesn't stop agitating it mgith be mor ebenenficaill emotionally to consider leavign as teh last option aftermenay other tries in other ways to restore a good relationship.
Ami B.

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