First my husband loads me up on junk food. Then I have a wedding to clean and COOK for...including the cake. (I am not complaining. It was a joy to bless my daughter, but just really hard.) Today I had the leftovers staring me in the face. I figured I might as well baby myself, with all the emotions I have had to go through. Then tonight my husband called and asked me if I wanted to go out with him tomorrow. (We are separated.) So what do I do? Say no and make it look like I am not trying on our relationship? Go and just drink water? I really don't even want to tell him I am trying to fast as I know he will sabotage my efforts even more. So, I am going. I am going to start my fast the next day...whatever day that is. I think Thursday. Today is Tuesday, isn't it?! My Dad's wedding is on the 19th and I really want my body clean, as well as to lose as much weight as possible before then. Oh gosh. I just realized I am planning on starting my fast on the first annivesary of my Mom's death. I tell you, it is one thing after another. I have to do this though. I have gained so much weight since her death. I feel lousy too. There are so many things in my life that I have no control over, so I need to get this one thing that I can control under control. Geesh. That was a mouthful.