So sorry to hear about your little fella. It's always hard to lose a friend.
Something about the way you described the situation unfolding reminded me of a vet in my old home town. He wasn't exactly a bad vet, just not the "right" vet. Most of the animals all seemed "at the vet's office" - hesitant, edgy, nervous. He was very professional and business like. Calm, cool, and detached professional are words that come to mind when I think of him. I ended up finding another vet, one whose furry and feathered patients seemed to love visiting, not dread. Neither my pets nor I ever regretted it. He's still the vet my parents use for their extremely spoiled dog.
When I moved here, I found a vet who works with the Humane Society not because she couldn't work elsewhere (for much more money) but because her heart just went out to all the throw-aways and she felt she had a calling to work with them. Whenever we've been in the waiting room, we see dogs straining at their leash to get inside, eager to go down the hall to see her. My cat would sit calmly in my lap (we had her carrier, but her illness and age made her more comfortable in my lap) with all the dogs running around on leashes, coming up to greet her and every other "new friend." Most of the animals (of course, there are always those 'exceptions! lol) just seemed to understand they were in a special environment at both vets and called a truce. I've not had a complaint yet with the care my furry friends (and I've had a LOT of furry friends) received from either.
Also, neither vet had any problems with "home remedies." In fact, both have offered invaluable advice and suggestions about how to improve on my herbal treatments and such. A really good vet is worth their weight in gold and definitely worth the extra effort to search out.