I think I broke myself....

I still don't know what I'm doing.

This is day 10, and I'll make it through that, but I made some mistakes yesterday:

1) I somehow managed to have only 1 and a half servings of mixture that smelled slightly fermented 'cause I left it out overnight. (Ah, chronic Depression and the single life...)

2) I was so excited about the "new and improved SWF" that I did it yesterday afternoon, had great results, but didn't put anymore sustenence in my body (except for some cheating spices). This morning, I woke up weak and awful, tried to do another SWF, and only kept down half of it, and half of that passed through.

I'm having difficulty recovering today. My concern is not necessarily that I'm sickly ('cause, hell, it could be stored up/stirred up toxins mixed with the lack of lemonade), but that I don't want to inadvertantly build up a psychological aversion to the MC. I have an amazing subconscious talent for it (such as when I was going through chemo several years back, and the nurses would have to pump me up with Ativan straight away because I would begin vomiting practically the moment I walked in the door of the unit). Hence my problems with the SWF.

So, current verdict, is finish the lemons and syrup that I have (about 4 days worth), then call it at that. Not bad, mind you, but it sucks to stop after I saw from the flush yesterday how much internal cleansing I still have to go. I'm stopping at the store to buy oranges/orange juice today, howe'er.

Anybody have any suggestions as how to deal with this? Can we compare and contrast the effects of several shorter flushes vs. a lenghty flush? Tweet