You and I share a common sort of background - and I agree with you. It is indeed difficult to feel sympathy for Alec when we have experienced being on the receiving end of an Alec. It is understandable that adults lose their cool, this is true, but I do believe that when it comes to the way that we speak to young people, then to talk like that is a high form of abuse. I don't give a shit if you are mad at your ex-wife, or if she is a psycho, there is NO excuse. He did it, he should not justify, just make her an amend. I don't care what the wife did or does, the daughter cannot afford the mind-screw that being threatened and called names by your own dad does.
My dad had his "reasons" for being put out with me. Was it indeed ok that he said "I am thinking of a way to kill you and get away with it"? Does it "depend on the circumstances"? I was 13 years old!!!!!!!!!! All I knew was that my dad wanted to kill me, but was afraid that HE would suffer if he did. All I knew when he picked his hand up to me and struck me and choked me as he called me a "little f**king whore" was that I might die that night, and would be glad for it rather than live in that hell. But I lived and survived. But not without very distinct and painful issues to resolve.
Alec is inflicting a terrible abuse, and should stop. Life, keep living, remember that it is very hard not to take it really personal. But if it helps I agree with you. No doubt, Kim is sick, too, but someone needs to jump off the excuse wagon and do the right thing by that poor little rich kid.