You are so young! Do you have family you could go to and have them help you? I know that if one of my boys was in trouble I would not mind having them back home. You don't sound like a loser. I too have been very sick. I got much better and within days once I stopped the sugar, processed foods, anf fruit, caffeine and my occasional glass of wine. My emotional well being greatly improved along with my cognitive functions. I was so emotionally devasted that I could not answer the phone, pay my bills or talk to people without feeling like I was going to have an anxiety attack. Neither my husband or kids gave me much worries yet my deterioration was coming from within.
As for your girlfriend, I doubt you are ready for a relationship being so young besides having health problems. If you have health insurance you should ask your doc to test you for food allergies and parasites.
Please do not give up and stop worrying about what others think. If they were in your shoes, do you believe they could do any better? If you never suffered with this malady would you be sympathetic to someone like yourself or would you in ignorance judge them?