| I told one of my girlfriends about what happened with me and the dude I was talking to. She said she was about to cry. I was like what??? why??? She said because she sees how happy I am when I'm in a relationship and all she sees is how the dude takes from me. They say you are a nice girl and that you deserve better and they take what they need from me (confidence, assurance, or just someone to talk to) and then they go on their merry way. She said all she can think is when is it gonna be your turn to be poured into just like you pour into other people. She says it like u sacrifice for people that don't give a shit about what you need. I was like what??? Do I really do that??? Am I some sort of martyr that sacrifices for others and doesn't get anything in return??? Am I just being used over and over??? I don't think so. I fall in love so fast and so hard that I do anything for the object of my affection. I know that is not a good thing but that is also not a bad thing. The thing that makes it good or bad is the other person. If the other person doesn't feel the same way then it's bad but if the other person feels the same way then it is the best love there is...I don't want to change the way I love...I love whole heartedly...because of this I know that I will be hurt...I try to prepare myself each time to deal with the pain if things go wrong...it usually still hurts like hell and I cry...but I still love...I long for the day I experience some reciprocity...I asked my father how not to be a martyr. He said that maybe I should go with dudes that need so much from me...but I like to be needed...I guess its best to be wanted...
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Fastingchick1000
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CureZone