- Survived Another Week by drpr
18 y
3,364 6 Messages Shown
Blog: Raw Odyssey
I'm still not eating raw, but I'm feeling better about my food choices over the past week. I've rediscovered soup, so I'm eating vegetable soups and my mangos. Eventually the healthier foods will outnumber the less healthy foods.
Financial problems have caused me to lose my cable, phone and internet access so that's impeded my ability to blog this week. However, I try to see the positive in everything. Local internet cafes help me with internet access and also get me out of the house. Not having a phone means no bill collectors to wake me up at 8 a.m. on Sundays. No cable means less distraction from studying. See? We can make it work!
I'm looking at some new housing options this week so that I can actually afford to live and even save up some money. The upheaval will not be pleasant and I'd prefer better choices in where to live, but my longterm goal of getting my Ph.D is my main guide to the decisions I make. If my decisions get my closer to that goal, then even if they are unpleasant I want to try to make them work. The move puts me closer to places that are necessary in my life- school, work and the gym.
Not being on raw is a real catch-22 for me these days. Eating raw really helped to lift my depression earlier this year, but it didn't make it impossible to get depressed over new situtations. Due to that depression I stopped eating raw. I think that if I'd managed to stay on raw, I wouldn't have gotten as depressed as I have. I'm hoping to follow Ren's lead in getting outside support in returning to raw (namely, bootcamp) but I simply cannot afford it. I'll let you all know what happens with that.
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drpr
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- support by ren
18 y
1,492
- Damn Girl! Been There. by bootzey
18 y
1,579
Ooh! You are taking me back to my Dental School days. Back then I was single and would go on dates just for the dinner that came along with it. My roomates used to "borrow" the toilette paper from school and went to every after school lecture for the food. We used to carry big bags, to cart food home in. I used to go shopping in my mother's pantry for house supplies and food. Grad school looks a lot more glamourous than it is. If your not one of those lucky people that have unlimited resources, you have to get your hustle on.
Trust me it gets better. You will make so much much in your practice, that you will never have to worry again. Then you can look back on these days, you will laugh. I promise.
Keep your head up!
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bootzey
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- Re: Damn Girl! Been There. by drpr
18 y
1,564
| You know what I'm going through!! I never thought it would be this bad. The stipend for grad students is below living wages but they "discourage" our working outside jobs outside our 20-hour-per-week graduate assistantship assignments. Impossible! So you end up working TWO jobs and attending a grad program. It's all very depressing. I can't wait for the day that I can look back on this and smile!!! I hope my future paychecks make all this worth it. (I hope your paychecks have made YOUR past suffering worth it!)
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drpr
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- I Understand by bootzey
18 y
1,505
Oh I had my hustle on with the job scene. I was bartending at night (getting paid under the table), I convinced an attending who was sweet on me (and married!)to give me a workstudy job doing library searches, and I got in on noteservice transcription. It didn't have to be that hard but I listened to some bad advice my parents gave me.
I learned a lot from the experience. The transcription was a way I could study and get paid for it. I learned how to stroke a man's ego to get what I needed without stroking other parts. And I never wanted for patients because those patrons at the bar had awful teeth and they wanted to help me as much as they could. There was a moment I had too much money. More money than needed with no time to spend it.
I hated dental school. It was like being on line and hazed for 4 years. I started it so I stuck with it to the end. There were jokers there I didn't want to have the satisfaction to see me quit and I didn't want to disappoint my parents. But to what end? I don't hate practicing dentistry. It wasn't what I expected either. I've learned, you've got to walk your own heart's walk. Hopefully I'll find the career that makes my heart sing. Not trying to discourage you. You do your damn thing!
I know some of your readers are probably dying to flame me, but you gotta do what you gotta do. As my mother says, "You have to stroke the lion's head when your hand is in his mouth."
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bootzey
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- Re: I Understand by drpr
18 y
1,469
| No, I understand what you are talking to. We have to make our way somehow, even if it means being unhappy now for what we hope is joy later. My mom and dad are so proud of my Ph.D endeavors that I would find it hard to quit based on that alone! They'd be so disappointed, even though they would probably never admit it. They dream of having a huge party for me when I graduate. I'll just be happy to have them both at my side on that day. I'm very lucky to still have them. So even though I'm suffering now, I keep my graduation day in my mind and tell myself this is worth it even on days when it doesn't seem to be!
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drpr
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