I'm sorry that you've had such negative experiences, but you have the power to turn your life around for your Self (Self = soul or that which makes you unique in all the world).

What is your age and, specifically why must you live in your current environment? The reason that I ask is simply that there are ONLY 2 things in this earthly lifetime that we HAVE to do: pay taxes, and die. Everything else boils down to making choices. Of course, it's frightening to make positive changes because you have been conditioned to believe that you are not deserving of a quality of life, much less capable of making one for yourself! I understand precisely how terrifying it seems from personal experiences.

Where did you find this therapist? Did they come recommended by a reliable source, or were they your only option as per family decisions? NEW therapist! Someone who understands malignant narcissism and post traumatic stress.

There is a world of light and peace out there, I promise you. Having said that, only you can determine what type of path you're going to take. For many years, I allowed an abusive sociopath determine every aspect of my life, from movie choices to religious practices, and I had to accept the fact that I had given that person complete control before I could begin the process of reclaiming ME for my Self to save my Self from complete ruin. Was I scared? Heck YEAH I was afraid! It meant taking control and responsibility for my own choices and actions, and I had to make a hard choice: did I want to evolve into the person that I was meant to be, or would I remain with the status quo and surrender my life to misery, abuse, and a living hell?

I left without friends or family - the ex-spath made it his mission to sever any source of moral, emotional, or financial support, and I Survived on my own, under my own steam. Was it hard? It surely was, and there were times that I could see myself living on the street in a cardboard box. But, life has a way of putting good human beings on our healing paths when we least expect it. If I could Survive, anyone with simple determination can, too.

Find a new therapist, and begin thinking about forcing options that will facilitate physical and emotional freedom from people that you cannot help, control, heal, or EVER reason with. One step at a time will see you well onto your healing path.

Myvery best wishes to you and brightest blessings.