First of all, don't go back to that shrink. It's well-documented that shrinks often have agendas, such as pleasing someone other than the patient, referring you to a friend in the field who prescribes pills so they can get a kick-back, as well as leaving you with cliffhanger diagnoses so you'll keep coming back and giving them money.

All that, and who knows what they're really thinking when you're telling them your issues...they could be thinking about the hot tub they want to install or fantasizing about a ham sandwich.

Seriously.

Secondly, are these family members that are detractors in your immediate sphere every day? Do you *have* to interact with them? If not, don't. You don't need people who are energy suc***s, as I'm sure you experienced a lot of those types before you had AF. You surely don't need them now.

Once you get fixed, you'll decide on your own, in your own new skin, how you want to handle those unsupportive family members. You may end up being resentful and want nothing to do with them, since they didn't at least try to make an effort to allay your fears when you were at your lowest. Fair is fair, and that's life, unfortunately.

Myself, I don't deal with toxic people or toxic family member. I didn't have that choice for many years, as I was a dependent, but I do now. It's liberating. You've found a community of like-minded folks here who are willing to support you.

Also, watch everyone's mind change if Oprah or something of that ilk does a show about Adrenal Fatigue. People are sheep, and just because there is a tide rising against you in terms of familial doubt, try to trudge on.

I am almost there. The melatonin helps me sleep like a log, and I'm back up to running six miles a day, like the wind.

The thing about AF is, as much as it sucks, it's a wake-up call. Most people are unaware of their personal traumas or issues when they get AF, and with a decompensated brain/brain fog/depression/anxiety/what have you, it's made much tough to parse through the hard truths of your past. But it has to be done, and once you're out the other side, the world will be a new place.

Not necessarily better or worse, just more real. You become "aware" to all the shit food and toxic people, crappy bosses, unhealthy lifestyles, etc. And you get better at tuning them out.

Listen, the bars (and probably the graveyards) are full of people right now with AF, they have this strong, unrelenting feeling of anxiety that has carved a hole in their beings, and they don't know anything else but to drink. That's the way it goes (to use a tired cliche), but that's what separates you from them. You are on a path to healing, and any time you do anything outside of the sphere of other peoples' lame realities, they're going to chide you for it. That's just the way people are.

It's good that your mom is supportive though. Has Walsh been *any* help at all? Has he written you back?

Hey Scotty,

My situation as far as support seems similar, although luckily no one thinks that I'm making up a story. My dad resents me for moving home and back into my old room, which had become his, and he is jealous of all of the fun and time I've been spending with my mother. It's difficult having to live with someone who is not in support of you.

My doctor, the one who I had been ranting and raving about how amazing she is, just fired me with no explanation and the people in her office have been incredibly cold and callous. I'm going to file a complaint to the state health board about it. I cried for many hours and felt hopeless.

But, thankfully, I just found an incredible holistic dental office and renewed hope in humanity. Plus, my teeth had turned brown from drinking my triphalla and I thought they would be stuck that way (I thought that I was loosing my enamel) but the dental hygenist cleaned them and they are white again. Hooray!

Anyhow, my mother continues to be a daily source of support and love, but it is amazing how hard it is to live with someone who doesn't seem to want you there. Well, I just keep trying to be loving anyways and eventually I hope that he will accept me at home. Luckily my mom will tirelessly stand up for me if need be.

Anyhow Scotty, I feel for you and am sending all of my love.

Beth

Hi Scotty,

I agree with those reply above: just avoid those who don't understand (never mind whether they are ignorant or simply have no idea). Stick with the one who support you. If possible, avoid those who's been sucking up your energy.

First of all, you have limited energy. And you need to get well. So now, spent your limited energy on things that can help you get well. If someone doesn't understand, never even waste time and energy to convince them. It just won't do. Simply block them out of your life. And focus on getting well.

I have met those who reaction is simply painful. But I also have several which has been very supportive. But majorly are clueless in between. So I won't wasted my time and energy on those who are ignorant, esp those who thinks they have all the answers and the one who ill is wrong. They are not worth of your explanation.

Surround yourself with good environment, supportive and understanding. If you can't find it in your family, find it elsewhere. You are not alone. We are all in this together. And yeah, just reading the postings here can really help you see that you are NOT imagining illness. We are NOT imaginary friends you know :) (just look at beautiful picture of Beth and others...you know we are real people.)

And no, they like to label you insane, you are NOT, don't give them that chance. As the matter of fact, they are the one who are (and just because they are majority doesn't mean they are right.)

Praying for you,
ERM

BBQ,
I don't know what to say except, people have just finally believed me after this last year or 2 and I have been sick for I guess around 8 years now.

When I first started getting ill, but could still work and function, I had my sister and roommate saying i was a hypochondriac. They said I spent too much time on the computer researching illnesses that I did not have. I knew something was really wrong but had no clue at that time what was going on with me. One day on the computer I felt myself passing out and screamed out to my sister to call 911, luckily at the time I was IM'ing someone online and was able to quickly type to them to call 911 too, because I passed out and fell out of my chair, my sister would not call the ambulance and rolled her eyes at me. The funny thing is I have never been a liar or known as one in my family and she treated me like I was. If it were not for the guy I was chatting with online, I would not have had anyone to help me.
I"m actually getting really upset thinking about this all over again, and mad at my sister. I thought I forgave her, so I guess I have not since this is bringing all of these feelings back.

I ended up moving and was in my own little place and was calling the ambulance just about every day from passing out or my body going numb on one side (hypoglycemia although I had no idea that is what it was at the time) and had family next door to me. Well, they weren't the least bit helpful, they would a lot of times not even come get me from the hospital in the middle of the night, and leave me stranded there with my child (I wasn't married or living with my husband at that time). Luckily there was this one guy I could call on and he would come get me. But my own family, no.

I was told by the doctor at one hospital she thought I had MS. Then I moved to another city and was having the same problems, and had friends getting ticked at me and my husbands friends, they were saying that I wasn't trying and being social, except I could not be social because I was so sick and scared all the time and had no idea what was happening to my body, I was a walking anxiety factory. Eventually a few of my husbands friends didn't like me anymore. This really hurt me, they didn't like the fact that I didnt' finish my education and that I could not work, and wasn't social.

I was planning on going back to finiish my education but I was so sick all the time, all I could think about most of the time was how incredibly ill I was all the time.

My husbands family also became turned against me, thought i was ruining his life I guess by my lack of education. Everyone in his family is well off, and my husband was struggling because my health was costing him so much. Man I'm getting ready to cry writing all of this.

My own family upset and wondering why I wasn't working or trying harder, and I would tell them I can't work, but they didn't buy it. Rumors of me being lazy and all kinds of things circulated. This is just the condensed version, there was so much more.

I was in and out of the hospital almost every day because I had no insurance and was constantly going to the ER. I was told again by another doctor they suspected I had MS again, but then for whatever reason they changed their mind and did not do the tests to find out.

I really just wanted my mom at that time to come and take care of me but the support from her was not there either. I mean she flew down to help out for a little bit but that wasn't enough.

I could sit here and go on and on about the different hurtful things that people said to me or how they treated me but let's just say that you are not alone in how you are being treated. People are not perfect, they do not usually have the capacity to be kind and empathetic. They usually need to be going through something in their own lives or to know about the illness in order to treat you in the way they should. I try to keep this in mind when I get upset, and it helps.

Initially I believe the search and recieving of supplements is the urgency to find a solution/cure. But then it becomes a coping mechanism sometimes because the truth is we buy stuff that we don't use. This looks bad on our behalf. I got all these supps I don't use because they haven't done me good or because my body doesn't tolerate them anymore.

Family opposition is unfortunate for the AF patient because if doctors don't validate the condition no one else will. The tradition of a condition starts with validation of a condition by physicians.

If there was an AF magazine...you know what i'm trying to say. I tell people about my thyroid issue and my AF issue and they all seem to lean more on the thyroid issue because it's in the air more. It's what people are "comfortable" with or are "use-to" hearing about more. AF, adrenals, adrenal fatigue, addisons, what's that?

Until doctors step up we won't get the respect other patients recieve.

Sorry for you bud

L

I'm really, really appreciative of all these added dimensions in your protracted comments, which go a long way to helping me (and us all) reconcile ourselves with this desperate challenge in the context of the rest of our species and the world.

AF is tough by itself to live with, never mind people being mistrusting, unsupportive and downright opposed from different angles.

Having a particularly fierce form of catabolic AF has demonstrated to me the very darkest side of being alive and I'm surprised that I am somehow still persisting.

Mr BBQ,

Bless your heart! I have great empathy for you. May peace come to you and may you be granted wisdom to walk your individual path toward full and complete restoration of your health.
I am very sorry your family members are the way they are. It's not easy.
Through much experience I have come to realize that unless one has walked this arduous path along the valley of the shadow of death they cannot come close to fathoming what we are talking about and experiencing. Just take for example the sleep deprivation....that one symptom.....that in itself cannot even be fathomed by those who have never endured a body that doesn't sleep for 3 days and 3 nights and then maybe can sleep one hour and then the cycle repeats itself.
Share and vent all you need where you feel safe to do that, if you have that luxury, if not, then try just writing it down and getting it out. It's very difficult not to have an empathetic ear, to "fight with the medical establishment (talking allopathic and alternative practitioners alike)" atop of all going through for just basic needs and to understand, very difficult to wade through all the conflicting opinions on every aspect of how to care for oneself from what is the best diet, supplements, testing, compounded medications, ad infinitum, to just have strength to make a meal for yourself, etc, etc, etc ,etc

Today I heard a female journalist being interviewed and what she said I felt was so applicable to ones like us:

She said: "If I were to leave someone during their most difficult time, that has implications for WHO I AM."

We are not responsible for how others perceive us although we bear that atop of all the other things. I am sorry for your hurt, pain and anguish physically, emotionally and psychologically and the fact that you have to cope with feelings of being unsupported, mis-understood, questioned and abandoned by those you would think would be there for you no matter what.
May you be infused with hope and goodness and mercy come your way SOON.

If it were all in your head then wouldn't it make sense one could WILL themselves well.