Well, I have to say, I never thought this day would arrive. I am on day 20 today, which for me is a major accomplishment. I have suffered alot as a very toxic, post-partum mummy, but I was so determined that I was going to get back on track. Alot of people find the goal of 40 days to be very excessive, and some find even The Master Cleanse
to be plain starvation. I read in someone else's post that it is interesting to see how people react to you with their insecurities. I have always known that some people like it better when you don't succeed, as it makes it easier for them to make excuses for themselves. I think alot of my problem pre-cleanse was that I too was basing most of my self worth and ability on those around me. It seems like everyone is struggling these days, and that was a good enough reason for me to keep eating and hiding. I was so worried about what everyone would say about a 40 day cleanse, that I first only told them(hubby included) that I was going for 21 days. I figured that if I made it to 21, then I would tell them. It would be easier for them to see it was okay, when they saw for themselves how much I had improved. I couldn't maintain that deception with my hubby, and when I told him, to my great suprise, he was 100% supportive. He has even joined me for ten days, today being his 6th. When he explained his reason for supporting me to our inner circle, he used these words:
"Drastic situations call for drastic measures"
When you feel like you can't go on anymore feeling that sluggish, unmotivated, & unhappy, you need to do something big to dig out of that hole. And as we all know it is a big hole, full of toxins. Before the cleanse, I was prescribed an anti-depressant to deal with the post-partum. After I woke up in a fog 18 hours later, and muddled through a day making big mistakes because of my fogginess, I told my doctor I couldn't use it again. She said , okay, we'll just try another. As I couldn't risk another day like that for my children's and my own safety, I began to think of other treatments.
"What if everything that I'm feeling is not a result of not adapting to my new life as a full-time mom? What if I am doing this job right, but am too polluted to know?? What could I gain from doing something so incredibly hard and extreme?"
detox no food
lose weight peer pressure
prove something to myself no food
So, I gave it a try. And here I am my fellow cleansing pals, to whom I owe a debt of gratitude for your advice and support. I am so happy it is almost sickening. No more mood swings, no more drama, no more over thinking to the point of paranoia. More weight loss, although I don't get on the scales. For me, that would make it about the numbers, but that is only a part of the big picture. I am so energetic that my hubby can only laugh with me. It's a big change for him to come home to a happy wife, a clean house and no drama to try and fix. Someone asked me the other day if I'm taking some kind of drug that is more powerful because I'm not eating. That was the only way they could explain my giddiness, because the truth was too threatening.
So, what now? I'm going to keep shooting for 40 days. I am a goal orientated person, so the 40th day falls on my son's first birthday. I always wanted to be back on top of things for his first birthday, and then my 30th birthday this September. Thanks to the cleanse, that may very well happen.
So thanks everyone for your posts and support, and I hope that you all have happy results from your cleanse.