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Didn't listen. 14 y
done
I just don’t take direction very well. It’s better but not 100%. My current sponsor told me to not make amends to Ex#2. I did anyway.
Now I’m paying emotionally.
I give it to God. How could my owning my behavior be bad? If someone chooses to give me 100% of the responsibility - there’s a no-win situation there. God’s way of clearing the wreckage and leaving in my life what is good for me. Why would I be in a situation where I am blamed all the time?
Just flush it.
Done. visit the page Day 26, 10 affirmations 14 y
Love is unstoppable.
1. Today I can look for G*d in the positive character traits of people around me today.
2. I can know that my positive character traits are just as much a representation of G*d as it is in others.
3. I can heal completely.
4. I am a kind, strong, conscientious woman.
5. I am lovable.
6. I am positive.
7. I was not a perfect Mom, but I can have faith that G*d had a plan for me and my son and we fulfilled that plan.
8. Life is beautiful today.
9. Whatever G*d has placed in front of me is what He has planned for me today. I don’t have to chase after anything. ... read more Day 24, ten affirmations 14 y
run for your life
Took 4 days off from working this. What happened? Worked Thursday night as planned. Watched a movie while I paid bills. Last minute deal to get the job done. Woke up Friday not looking forward to the AA party I was invited to. Worked 10 days in a row by this time. It was the Christmas Eve fiasco family. I truly felt that I had to go to make amends for not taking care of myself and for blaming them for my emotional well-being. While I didn’t say it at the time in any way to let them know that this was what I was doing and thinking while it was happening, I know I was doing it. I a ... read more Day 18, 10 affirmations 14 y
answers
I need to be careful for what I ask for, I may get the answer - I also can use this as a tool of courage and facing the fire head on. I can use this to rocket forward. Fasten the seat belt and go.
1. Today I can ask G*d, with courage, exactly what His will is for me.
2. Today I can trust that I am feeling the results of my failures because I am growing toward health.
3. Today the best thing I can do for my life is just stay sober and stay in the day.
4. Pray to G*d today that if He wants me to contact people to make amends, He WILL let me know where and when and with the ... read more Just want to 'feel better' 14 y
chit chat
Skied 6 runs, challenged myself to go on the blue trail mountain rather than stay on the green. The view is so, so different from the higher elevation. Fresh snow on the trees. The trees are 5-7 feet tall due to their being on the alpine elevation line. It was so beautiful from up there! I took photos with my camera and sent them to my sister.
Ex #1 had court this morning. Didn’t need me to be of service to him at all. Did invite me to stay over last night but I declined. Then, the next day - he suddenly didn’t need me anymore for a ride. Quite a coincidence I’d say. He lives ... read more Day 17, ten affirmations 14 y
let go of anger and resentment
What is my story? What is my story? What do I have to fear if I truly, truly look at my story?
Bins of photos of my past life just sitting there. No story, just jumbled snapshots. What if I truly put it together? It will have a beginning, a middle, and an end. It will represent our story - all of us who have shared time and space together. Writing this makes me want to cry.
I think of my elderly mother and her life in front of the television. From the moment she gets out of bed until the moment she goes to bed - it is on. She has been this way my entire life. No story repre ... read more Day 16, ten affirmations 14 y
one perfect memory
Missed yesterday. Why? I just don’t know. Skipped morning routine, that’s why.
1. Today I can feel like crap on the inside and not show it on the outside.
2. Today I can change how I feel on the inside by strapping on my snow shoes.
3. I am in relationship with G*d today.
4. I am enough.
5. I have enough.
6. I do enough.
7. I am G*d’s child.
8. I can remember that all others in front of me are God’s children as well.
9. I am not so unique in the human experience that I am utterly alone.
10. I deserve all the happiness I can create, find, accept an ... read more Day 14, ten affirmations 14 y
10 affirmations
Black, organic coffee. Thank you, G*d.
1. Today I can retain the positive messages in my morning readings and lean on them for strength, faith, courage and hope.
2. Today I can be unafraid and hand it ALL over to G*d. I can stop worrying about everything.
3. Today I can act like it’s all up to me with my actions and believe that it is REALLY all up to G*d with the results.
4. Today I can be lemon-fluffy-light in all I choose to think and do.
5. Tonight I can go snow shoeing by the full moon and have a ’date’ between my spirit and G*d.
6. Today I can choose to let ... read more Day 13, evening 14 y
do i want the piano
Day 13 of positive affirmations. Can’t hurt.
This morning I was truly out of my own body. I cannot afford to let myself plow through. I am middle-aged, I’m not 23 anymore. I am working on my 7th day straight at work and the emotions are running. They have a life of their own if I let them.
Ex #2 emails me today. Wants to know if I want the piano. No, what I’d really like is to have an adult conversation about how the kids have been these past two years, how my elderly ex-mother-in-law is doing, how the Siamese cat I loved is doing, if I can have something that actually I can u ... read more Day 12?, ten affirmations 14 y
10 affirmations
Crazy morning in my head. Just beside myself. Lights out at midnight last night, awake at 6 and out of bed at 7am. Worked w/sponsor, went to a meeting, read 6&7 as directed when I got home. So much for 10-6 guideline. I’ll keep trying. Still have not taken out the TV except for Sunday nights. I think I’m gaining ground on self-esteem because of it. I just don’t feel as hopeless when I wake up in the morning for some reason. I’ve done my make up and hair every day this week and it makes a difference.
This morning I baked cookies for my landlords and delivered them for their trip ... read more Late night. 14 y
self will
Met w/sponsor. Got home @ 10pm. Took a bath. Ate a pizza. Going to read Step 6 out of the 12&12 then go to bed. I’m pooped out.
$145 speeding ticket today. There goes the overtime. Well, a good lesson in ’self-will run riot’ I’m learning.
Good night. visit the page Day 12, ten affirmations 14 y
ten affirmations
* Today it is progress, not perfection and that has to be good enough.
* Today I am willing to serve those around me as an ambassador of God’s Goodness and Grace.
* Today what goes on in my head is not reflected in all of my actions, I have self-control.
* Today I am willing to make amends as the need arises, I do not cower.
* Today I am rich with God’s Power and Joy.
* Today I can welcome people into my life and have true love, service, wisdom and friendship to offer.
* Today I can not ask for anything from anyone and have all I need.
* Today I am sober, lovin ... read more 27 days ago... 14 y
just breath
...I was positively sinking. The despair was all around me and I hadn’t felt like I could dig out but knew somehow I just absolutely had to trust and take an action. It was like a fog and I could only see 2 foot steps in front of me. It’s not like a clear day when we truly see everything all around.
Today is similar so I’m taking an inventory. Get honest with myself.
Got the grooming thing down - teeth, face, hair, makeup.
Lacking the early morning routine. Just don’t want to get up but it’s moments like this that I HAVE to just get the routine down. My night routine is SO M ... read more Day 11, ten affirmations 14 y
affirmations
* What I don’t have is because it IS NOT in my best interest to have it. visit the page Day 11, ten affirmations 14 y
maturity through self responsibility
Digging down deep. Woke up reviewing resentments and judging. Life is so precious and every second counts. Surely there has to be a better use of my brain power and time.
* Today I will remember that LOVE can change all in miraculous ways.
* Today I will choose to have faith that as long as I believe in the healing and changing power of love - I am safe, truly safe.
* Today I will choose to remember that the results of my efforts are up to God.
* Today I will be grateful for what I have.
* Today I will remember that what I don’t have is what is in my long-term best i ... read more Ten affirmations 14 y
10 affirmations
So, 10 affirmtions.
* My self esteem is contingent only on my relationship with my God
* How I treat others is indicative of that relationship I have with my God
* My expectations of others are merely an act of my own self-will
* I can let go of everything today, absolutely everything and just do what is in front of me
* It is my responsibility to seek God and His solutions for my problems, no one elses
* No one, I repeat no one, is responsible for my well-being or peace today
* I am valuable simply because I am a child of God
* I can imagine I have wings to ... read more compassion 14 y
Thank you, God.
I must remember that how I treat people really has nothing to do with who they are and everything to do with who I am. I found myself feeling like a victim today and so much wanted to lash out in anger or bring up an action that I felt slighted me. I was able to just go inward and ask God to help me get quiet. I prayed and just pulled my focus on my core and asked God to keep me quiet. I asked God to help me remember that the disturbance is about me and not them. I asked God to help me just nurture myself in that moment, to remember that this journey is about me and my relationship wi ... read more |